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The Heartache of the "Seconds"
In the beginning, after your child has died, you often hear or read about the “firsts”; occasions or events that occur for the first time since your child’s death. We have now come to a year and a few months later and are going through the same events for the second time. The second time is agony.
The Holidays are Salt in the Wound
I used to love this time of the year. Now it's like rubbing salt in an open wound.
The Meal Has No Flavor
Doing things after your child dies is liking eating a meal that has no flavor.
The Meaning of Regret
We all have experiences in our lives that have caused us to feel regret. Since our daughter died, the feeling of regret will haunt us forever.
The Necessity of Shock
We’ve been living under a cloak of shock. The cloak is velvety and soft, almost comforting, but very heavy and burdensome and at times feels like it might cover me up. Still, under it is a better place than being without it altogether.
The Other Children Know
I have seen some remarkable children since my daughter's death. Her 8 and 9 year old friends and classmates are a constant amazement to me in how they are able to process grief and move forward with positive thoughts and good, kind memories of things they did with their friend.
The Pain of Silence
When Aine died we heard a new sound. Emptiness.
The Physical Effects of Grief
We are working so hard to manage our emotions that our bodies suffer. The physical elements of grief are serious and sneak up on us without our knowledge because we are so mentally consumed in our heartache. It is so important that we be aware that grief can make us sick.
The Week of School Vacation is Wretched
It’s school vacation week again, a time of the school season I used to really love because I could just hang out with my daughters. But now I dread it.
The Weeks Leading Up to Christmas
Our daughter is dead and we all we hear is “merry Christmas” or “enjoy the holidays” or “the new year will be better”. ‘Tis the season to be jolly does not compute. Merry and bright are the opposite descriptions of how we really feel. Holly, jolly, fa, la, la, la, la. Blah.
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