Is there someone in your life who gave you affirmations in childhood or who goes beyond compliments to let you know how much you mean to them right now? What we say, and how we spend time with our children, tells them how we feel about them as individuals, regardless of their daily accomplishments or challenges.
These days, we can be so busy, and so hurried, we don't take the time to relate to one another in positive and life affirming ways. Having a list of activities that crowd our days while cutting us off from real contact with one another is common in families who do not have a child with a diagnosis.
Several times a day, take a deep relaxing breath and think of what you most enjoy about your child. The thoughts that drift into your consciousness may surprise you.
Often, what is written up on developmental charts or as IEP goals have little to do with a child's personality, talents and abilities. They are always having to spend time on what is most difficult for them, rather than building on their strengths and interests.
Ordinary life should be delightful and inspiring for all of us. We are not in a dress rehearsal for our real lives. Often, we miss the small pleasures of each day because we are not paying attention. If you smile at something ten times a day, make an effort to smile fifteen times tomorrow. There are dozens of small events each day that just take noticing.
When you are counting what is wonderful about family members, count yourself in, too. We are role models, and more, for our children. They identify with us. Hearing positive remarks and affirmations about parents is like hearing the same about themselves. They feel they are partially us until they are fully grown.
Say something nice about yourself two or three times each day. That is more difficult than it sounds, especially if others are not appreciating us out loud.
Many families do not have the habit of making positive comments about themselves or one another. It can take time to build up the habit. Keep trying until you are comfortable verbally admiring one another.
It is well worth making the effort to spend time with friends and family members who build up our self confidence and trust, and finding professionals or other staff who do the same. Often, mentioning that you are experimenting with affirmation in your child's life and asking other adults to try it out for a while will instigate better relationships all around.
Bonding While Learning
Thoughts From the Middle of the Night
Seeds of Compassion
Resources for bringing compassion into your community, home, family, school and workplace
http://www.seedsofcompassion.org/why/resources.asp#parents
Is Diversity Like A New Box of Crayons?
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art5144.asp
Asking More from Medical Professionals
Recess Skills for Children with Special Needs
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art432.asp
Music Education and Music Therapy
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art46397.asp
Art and Self Expression for Children with Special Needs
Reading Readiness and Reading Strategies
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art35577.asp
Teaching Your Child to Plan Meals and Cook
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art38064.asp
Mixed Feelings about Early Intervention
Supporting Emotional Needs of the Gifted
Learning Disabilities
Grandparents of Children with Special Needs
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art37114.asp
Disability Advocacy and Awareness
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art35878.asp
Signing, Reading and Spelling
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art33567.asp
Reflux - Pediatric GERD, Infant GER and EER
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art3730.asp
Sleep Disorders and Children with Special Needs
http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art33877.asp
Special Education
The BellaOnline Early Childhood website has many excellent articles; these are a few you might enjoy:
Stimulating the Mind of Your Infant
Children Need The 4 A's - Attention, Appreciation, Affection, and Acceptance
Early Childhood Education - Resources and Information
Tips for Temper Tantrums
