Many doctors in the world of medicine are divided about whether or not abortion is psychologically harmful to women. Many say yes, and that the number is far greater than anyone has let on. Many others say not, and that either there is no harm, or the harm cannot be attributed to the abortion itself, but to some underlying pre-existing issue, that is exacerbated by the abortion.
I think it is probably a combination of both, another reason, I wish all the bickering would end. If we all put our heads together, just think of the great things we could accomplish. In the meantime, I wanted to tell you about the large number of women, who have had an abortion, and are not ashamed or sorry that they made that choice.
If you are woman who fits into that category, you are not alone. There are even websites now, solely dedicated to allowing women who chose abortion and do not regret it, to tell their stories. They are women from all lifestyles, and all circumstances, that want other women to know it is perfectly all right, not to be upset, or feel guilty after exercising their right to choose, and choosing an abortion.
When Angie Jackson put her video blog on the internet, after taking a prescription abortion pill, it was the gasp heard round the world. Most women don’t discuss having an abortion, let alone, putting live feed of a woman going through one, on the web to go viral.
She got me to thinking though, as did the stories of other women like her. Why should they not put it out there, that they are not ashamed, or sorry? It is our right as women, to say when, if, how, and by whom we become pregnant. The anti-choice supporters and the abusers and coercers bring the shame and the guilt. They certainly are not qualified to undermine women and their rights.
I still don't think anyone wants an abortion, like they want a Ferrari, or a Chanel bag, but birth control in all forms has a failure rate. And spare me with the “abstinence is the only safe way”. So, women who do not ever want to have children, are also never to have sex? Everyone at some point in his or her lives, faces making a decision about birth control. What women want is foolproof birth control.
My point being, a certain percentage of the abortions performed every year, are performed because the birth control they were using failed. Why should women be made to feel ashamed or regretful about having an abortion they never wanted to be faced with at all? I don't think they should.
I applaud the women who are sharing their stories with other women, essentially to share their strength, their wisdom, and their rights! It is okay if you chose to have an abortion, and its okay to feel good about the decision you made. That is what women have fought decades to safeguard.
No one should be placing judgment on others, and no one should have anything to say about someone's personal choices.
It is certainly okay to shed light where others have placed plenty of darkness, and to support the women who find themselves making the same decision.
No one is perfect or has the perfect life. Birth control is not perfect, and neither are all the circumstances in the lives of the people who use it. Why are we not working together, to put all that energy where it should be?
Work to strengthen the effectiveness of birth control, making it affordable and accessible to anyone. Work to stop abuse, coercion, birth defects, poverty, unemployment- all the things that make the option of abortion necessary.
Thank you to the women who are helping other women to eradicate the shame, wrongfully placed on them. Shame on those people whose ignorance, created it.
If you want to read stories from the women erasing shame, or to learn more about how you can help them, I have included some links below.