Spring is a time for religious and spiritual observances. Ostara, the Pagan holiday which celebrates the renewal of life and heralds the new Spring, was recently celebrated on March 21. This week, observances are held for two other major religions. The holidays are Passover and Easter.In a way Ostara,Passover and Easter are intertwined, as all three celebrate life.

Many religious scholars believe that Jesus was observing the Jewish Passover seder with family and friends in what Christians call the Last Supper.

There are intermarried couples who will be observing and celebrating both holidays together.Others will be observing separate holidays.

Having the same religious and spiritual beliefs are part of a criteria for many people when they are seeking a marriage partner. Many people feel strongly that the person they are going to marry should be of the same religion, have the same traditions and customs, and intensity of belief as they themselves do. For these people this is an integral part of their idea of marriage.

Then there are others who marry someone who is “outside” their religion. Many times they must overcome family opposition to be with the one they love. Sometimes, if one partner feels so deeply about his or her religion, their future spouse will convert. This converting only works if the partner is not coerced into changing their religion or is not strongly held by the tenets of his or her own faith. Changing your religion for your partner, against your will, especially if your religion has always been a very important factor in your life, never works.

The third scenario for religion in a marriage is when both spouses keep their own separate religions, sharing holidays and the traditions that go with them. They respect their spouses’ religious and spiritual beliefs and many times each one learns to appreciate the differences and the beauty in both religions.

In writing this article I interviewed 5 couples. Two had married people of the same religion as themselves and said this was an important point for them. They had strong feelings about their religion.

“I actively sought someone who was Jewish because I knew I wanted children and I wanted them raised in a traditional kosher home,” said Dan as he held hands with his wife Michele. “My faith has always been an important part of my life, from childhood to being an adult. It has given me a strong sense of who I am. I wanted a woman who felt the same sense of self, as I did, in her religion.

Two of the couples had married outside their religion. They enjoyed sharing each other’s different holidays and made sure that they gave equal time to their religious observances. Cara a Pagan helped color eggs for her husband James who is Christian.

"The egg is a symbol of life.There are eggs for Ostara also. We share our beiefs, we argue good-naturedly, and we celebrate our differences with love."

One couple had children and were raising them to respect both religions.

“I love seeing the candles on the altar at Easter time. They are reminiscent of the Sabbath candles I light on Friday nights,” said Miriam, a Jewish woman married to Colin, a Roman Catholic man. "Our son and daughter are learning about the differences, and the similarities of our beliefs.”

David became a Russian Orthodox before marrying his wife, Alexa. He had been a Methodist. Alexa did not ask him to convert.

“I fell in love with the beauty and passion of her religion. She was as surprised as anyone when I told her of my decision. My parents weren’t happy about it, especially my Dad, who is deeply involved in his church. But they’ve come to see how happy I am in my beliefs and they respect that.”

Certainly, couples seeking to get married should discuss what part religion will play in their lives and how important spiritual beliefs are to one another. If one partner truly wishes to convert it should be treated with love and respect. Both partners should attend counseling with the minister, rabbi, or priest during the conversion.

Sometimes opposites attract and sometimes the comfort of familiarity is more attractive.

The couples who had married others of the same religion said that they would not have chanced falling in love with someone not of their religion. They had dated only those with the same beliefs.

There are many aspects to a marriage. Religion is only one of them, but a very important one at that. A person’s religious or spiritual beliefs are one part of the whole that makes up the person you love. You need to be comfortable with that person.