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Humorous Bath Products for Salvation Seekers and Non-Believers

If you’ve ever wondered at the ease with which Christians purportedly earn redemption regardless of how virtuous or how sinful they’ve been, you’ll get a kick out of the “Wash Away Your Sins” line of products created by Blue Q. Sold in clever retro packaging with old-school appeal, the products hearken back to an age when T.V. Moms in sweater sets and pearls sold wholesomeness and innocence alongside tuna noodle casserole and Toll House cookies. If cleanliness truly is next to godliness, then Blue Q may have the market on salvation cornered with its penitent and practical products, including a lip balm advertised as “anointment ointment” and a bubble bath that acts as a “baptism in a bottle.”

Although the products themselves actually do work and smell quite nice, the real appeal of “Wash Away Your Sins” products is the packaging. Take for example the directions that are included on the back of each package: not only do they give step-by-step instructions on how to do things that should be perfectly self-explanatory for any rational person (which is amusing in and of itself), they do so with loads of alliteration and religious satire. For example, the hand soap directions instruct sinners to “rub hands together religiously, rinse, and repeat,” and the breath spray directions assure users that they will “exhale cleansed from sin, ready to do-it-again.”

Perhaps my favorite product to carry is the antibacterial moist towelettes for sinners on the go. I placed one of these towelette packs in my purse three years ago in expectation of the day when my need for salvation would outweigh my desire to keep the cute little package on hand, but I still haven’t used it. I suppose my enthusiasm for the packaging exceeds my necessity to absolve myself of sin and soil. This desire to keep rather than to use products is the only real drawback to the line, other than the fact that certain products, such as the shower curtain or hand cream, are only available as part of a pricier kit.

Nevertheless, the products offer an amusing way to get believers and non-believers talking (and laughing) about religion together. Moroever, even the most hardened atheist would probably welcome attempted conversion if it came in the form of a “Wash Away Your Sins” bath kit or party pack. On the other hand, if the theists you know have no sense of humor at all, it might be best to avoid displaying these products at home and leave out a nice bottle of bleach when they visit instead. After all, no one wants to be accused of having an unclean home…or unclean thoughts.

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