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What Men Really Mean...


WHAT MEN REALLY MEAN...

WHAT THEY SAY

What They Really Mean

I'M GOING FISHING

"I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with
a stick in my hand, while the fish
swim by in complete safety."

IT'S A GUY THING

"There is no rational thought pattern
connected with it, and you have
no chance at all of making it logical."

CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?

"Why isn't it already on the table?"

UH HUH, SURE, HONEY,
OR YES, DEAR...

"Absolutely nothing.
It's a conditioned response."

IT WOULD TAKE
TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN

"I have no idea how it works."

TAKE A BREAK HONEY,
YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD.

"I can't hear the game
over the vacuum cleaner."

THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR.

"Are you still talking?"

YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS

"I remember the theme song to 'F Troop',
the address of the first girl I ever kissed,
and the vehicle identification numbers
of every car I've ever owned,
but I forgot your birthday."

OH, DON'T FUSS,
I JUST CUT MYSELF,
IT'S NO BIG DEAL.

"I have actually severed a limb,
but will bleed to death before
I admit that I'm hurt.
"

HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS
FOR WHAT I'M DOING.

"And I sure hope
I think of some pretty soon."

I CAN'T FIND IT.

"It didn't fall into my outstretched
hands, so I'm completely clueless."

WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?

"What did you catch me at?"

I HEARD YOU.

"I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."

YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER
LOVE ANYONE ELSE.

"I am used to the way you yell at me,
and realize it could be worse."

YOU LOOK TERRIFIC.

"Please don't try on one more outfit,
I'm starving"

I'M NOT LOST.
I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE.

"No one will ever see us alive again."

WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK.

"I make the messes, she cleans them up."

YOU'RE THE BEST WIFE
IN THE WHOLE WORLD.

"Please buy me something nice for Christmas."

~~ Author Unknown ~~

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