Boys are certainly hardwired differently than girls. One way this manifests itself is in the area of aggressiveness and activity. This often leads to the current over-diagnosis of ADD/ADHD. The over-diagnosis makes it difficult for parents to be taken seriously when a real problem exists.

My son does not have ADHD, but I do have ADD. School was always difficult for me, even though I was in honors programs all throughout school. Social situations were a nightmare for me, and to this day, I feel anxiety in meeting new people, though people generally tell me they would never know I had ADD or difficulty with peer relationships.

If you suspect your child may have ADD/ADHD, it’s imperative that you don’t self-diagnose, but rather take your child to someone who specializes in ADD/ADHD, a neurologist, mental health issues, or learning disabilities. There are tools available online that can help you assess if you need to contact one of these specialists for further evaluation:

General Info & Screeners:

Family Doctor

Healthy Place

ADHD at NIMH

National Institute of Health

One ADD Place

Once you have the diagnosis, what should you do? There are several routes available to you

Medication: Some families are staunchly set against “legalized speed” like Ritalin and other medications. However, consider that if your child had diabetes, you would administer insulin. It is really a decision to be made with all the facts in hand and not a reaction based on the stigma of medicating your child. I say this as someone who fought against medication for many years! Not everyone with ADD/ADHD needs medication, and there have been many, many new classes of medications introduced over the years since Ritalin first hit the shelves.

Behavioral therapy: The ADD Warehouse (www.addwarehouse.com) has wonderful materials, books and games for helping your child with social skills and reading social cues. Rather than working with a therapist, I chose coaching (explained below). Therapy, in my own opinion, is best reserved for those experiencing situational issues. For brain-wiring issues and chemical imbalances, talking doesn’t really address the root issue. This type of therapy must be done in concert with something that addresses the wiring or imbalance. Other resources would be a medical doctor specializing in neurology and SPECT (brain) scans.

Coaching: As a person struggling with ADD, I found coaching to be the most invaluable resource to me. Coaching is task-oriented assistance. You meet with your coach on a pre-defined basis (weekly, twice-weekly, monthly, etc.) in one or a combination of ways (in person, e-mail or by phone). Since the person with ADD/ADHD often has trouble organizing belongings and information, a coach helps the person sort out what the priorities are, and breaks tasks down into “bite sized” manageable tasks (since we are often overwhelmed with “big stuff”). They then check in with us to see how we are progressing on these smaller tasks. Coaching varies in price depending upon the mode and frequency of meetings. Many offer free consultations and informational “phone bridges.” Some have sliding-scale fees; others offer a reduced rate for working with students gaining clinical hours. Resources for coaches are as follows:

Coaches:

Optimal Functioning Institute

ADD Coaching

(See the section on Organizations below, as they often have referrals as well)

Homeopathic Helps: As with anything, evaluate the following as you would anything. I personally found increasing my intake of Omega 3/6/9 helped tremendously. Additionally, I increased my intake of foods containing tryptophan (turkey, bananas, pumpkin seeds), while decreasing my intake of refined sugar. Some really believe in the Feingold Diet (http://www.feingold.org/), others have dismissed it as “quackism”. Again, you will need to evaluate what ultimately proves to be helpful.

Co-Morbidity: It is important to note that depression is often a “co-morbid” condition. This means that people with ADD/ADHD concurrently suffer with depression due to the frustration we experience over what for others may seem like minor tasks. Further, because of poor social skills and other things causing low self-esteem, depression is quite common in people with ADD/ADHD.

For more on the subject:

Articles:

http://borntoexplore.org/boys.htm

http://www.drgreene.com/21_1021.html

http://www.kennedykrieger.org/kki_news.jsp?pid=2389

http://www.focusas.com/Peer%20Relations%20and%20ADHD.htm

http://www.news-medical.net/?id=18363


Organizations:

Children & Adults with ADD (ChADD)

ADDA


Online Resources:

ADD at BellaOnline.com

LD Online

ADDers

Books:

Driven To Distraction

ADDitude Magazine

Healing ADD

Answers to Distraction

Delivered From Distraction

ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life