The six-month mark has passsed and the prospective parents are preparing for the arrival of a new addition to the family.

The nursery is being put together, in appropriate color if the sex is known. It is probably yellow or green if baby is shy on the sonogram or Mom and Dad have decided that it should be a surprise.

While the non-pregnant partner is being supportive and caring, Mom is scared, particularly if she is going through this for the first time. Everyone has their horror stories about labor and delivery, all of which they seem compelled to tell a prospective mom, particularly a newbie.

Why do they do this? They are actually welcoming a new mom to the club, but it is an awfully harsh way to go about it!

Let's go to the facts. All parents should go through childbirth classes. Whether or not parents have chosen to have "natural" childbirth, the classes assist with breathing techniques and provide solutions for back labor, which is not helped with breathing, but IS helped by other options, such as lying on tennis balls that are placed across the small of the back!

Parents should find out if the hospital allows Mom to walk around during labor. Walking helps greatly with easing contractions.

During childbirth classes, parents should ask questions about what REALLY to expect when going to the hospital. While the hospital tour is a dandy idea, Mom needs to know exactly what is going to happen.

A lactation consultant should be on board to provide instruction and not to make Mom feel guilty if she chooses not to breastfeed. That is an individual decision that should be decided upon by the parents and no one else.

How is Mom going to feel after the birth? This is important for both her and the baby because hospitals tend to discharge new mothers quickly and the parents need to know what to expect.

Visits to the obstetrician occur more frequently beginning at the eighth month. Moms shoud expect to see the doctor on a bi-weekly basis then and on a weekly basis the last month. Weight gain will increase at this time, maybe as much as a pound per week as baby becomes stronger and eats more. It is important to monitor diet throughout pregnancy, but the last months are nutritional building blocks for a strong, healthy child.

If Mom chooses to have an epidural, the parents still can view the birth and she should not be made to feel that she has failed in any way. After all, why experience the horror of the horror stories? Be as comfortable as YOU choose when you give birth and recover. There is no "one right way." This is YOUR time. Enjoy the experience fully!