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BellaOnline's Life Coaching Editor


How well do you know yourself?

I used to think I was a shy person, but through the years Iíve noticed that thatís not true, actually Iím rather introverted, which is different from being ďshy.Ē Maybe I enjoy being alone because I spent a lot of time by myself playing or reading in my room as a child. Or maybe I was born this way and I felt a desire for solitude very early in life. Perhaps if I really needed to be around a lot of people, I would have found them.

Life coaching is about closing the gap between what you have now and what you desire. What you desire is your dream or your goal. The first step to realizing a dream/goal is to take inventory. For example itís cool to fantasize about rocking a stadium full of adoring, cheering fans ala Beyonce, but that could NEVER be me, not even on a local level on the stage of the Billy Holiday Theater right down the street. Not Karaoke at a bar with close friends. I donít even sing in the shower. I know whatís in me and a rocker doesnít exist, not even a glimmer. Iíd much rather be lost in a book.

Itís my opinion that you already have to have a little, tiny piece of what you want inside of you before you actually get it all. You need at least a teeny, little spark that you can stoke into a blazing fire. I wonít rock the stageóthatís not inside of meóhowever since I was a child Iíve never met a piece of paper that I didnít want to scribble on.

I was reading at age 4, writing poetry in the third grade, this is inside of me, always has been and always will be. Itís inevitable. Try to stop me from writing. Itís something that Iíll fight all sorts of adversity to do. And get this sometimes writing is not even a pleasant or enjoyable enterprise, but itís always gratifying. And I know all of this because Iíve been taking stock mainly by writing in my journal several times a week if not every day for the last decade. I need to spend at least part of my day alone to be at my best.

Whatís inside of you? Do you know what gratifies you? What sorts of people and experiences are you attracted to? If you could be anywhere, doing anything right at this moment where would you be? Answer these questions in your journal. Then take the examination further. Are your goals aligned with your temperament and strengths?

Self-awareness is the first step in goal attainment. In fact itís the guide that leads you there.

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