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Reminder: This newsletter, How To Organize, is sent each Thursday. Issues have been expanded and will include tips and resources. Plus there will always be a Question of the Week feature. I hope you will answer it!
This week's question is: How do you say no?
Pop on over to the forum and let me know. Here is the link: http://forums.bellaonline.com/ubbthreads.php/topics/726229/How_do_you_say_no#Post726229
This weeks Organizing Extra was written with the question of the week in mind. (The Organizing Extra is a fresh feature to this newsletter. It's micro article with a couple of quick tips. Please share your feedback on this added feature.)
Organizing Extra - How To Say No:
We are about to officially enter the holiday season. With that come the demands. Especially the demands for our time and money. It's quite easy to find yourself saying yes one minute and regretting it the next. Women are wired to please. We hate to disappoint. But it's just not prudent, nor healthy to say yes to every request. Too many yeses will send us to the land of resentment. And that's not a pretty place to visit. So, what can we do to to regain some balance?
First of all, recognize that learning how to say no will take some practice. It is a skill. Here are some tips to get you started:
Realize your time is valuable. Your time is just as valuable as anyone's. Which means it's as valuable as the person who's making a request of you. If accepting that request means you have to give up something of your own, you owe it to yourself to say no. And you owe it that person. No one, at least anyone who cares about you, would want you to give up anything so they could gain.
Evaluate the situation. Are you the only one who can take on the task? Is it an emergency? If so, you probably will be compelled to say yes, and rightly so. Beyond that you need to take a minute and give some thought to what saying yes will mean for you. When you think about committing do you feel good? If the answer is anything short of enthusiastic yes, then a no would probably best for all involved. Remember, it's far easier to go back and say yes, than to take back a yes.
Give an explanation. It doesn't have to be detailed. A simple I am just too busy is fine. Preface the explanation with a gracious statement. 'Thank you for thinking of of me, but I will have to say no because.....' is perfect. As a matter of fact ,you should practice saying this statement so it feels like you own it. Soon you will find it rolls off your tongue as easily as yes.
Offer alternatives. But only if you can do it right on the spot. Don't promise to find a solution, that only adds to your to-do list. You can always contact the person later if a brilliant alternative pops into your head.
No is a complete sentence, one you should embrace. It sounds nicer when the sharp edge is taken off, but don't take too much edge off or you may find yourself being cajoled into a yes. Get comfortable with no. Using it is guaranteed to relieve stress.
Organizing Resource (Another new feature. This will highlight some resource related to the topic of the week or the season we are in.)
Take back control of your time, just in time to enjoy the holidays!
What if you could actually relax knowing all your to-do's were accounted for?
What if you could stop feeling stressed out and exhausted?
Just imagine how great that would be!
You donít have to be content imagining. The Less Stress, More Joy Holiday [Un]Workshop can make it a reality!
Learn about it here (You won't believe what good value it is and it supports worthwhile causes!): http://organizingmaven.com/holiday-organizing-workshop/
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Please let me know if there is an issue you would ike to see covered. I hope to hear from you sometime soon, either in the forum or in response to this email message. I thrive on your feedback!
Feel free to pass this message along to family and friends. And be sure to visit organization.bellaonline.com for even more great content about organization.
Kelly Jayne McCann, Organization Editor
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