April 17 2010 Marriage Newsletter
Last week, we spoke about the financial implications of divorce. This week, I want to talk about the emotional implications of divorce.
You can click the link below to read the article. Lesson 3 - The Emotional Implications Of Divorce Is there such a thing as a painless divorce? http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art56466.asp
5 TIPS FOR AN AMAZING RELATIONSHIP
1# MAKE TIME FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Time and time again, people tell me my ideas are wonderful, but they feel they can't be as loving or romantic as I am because they don't have enough hours in the day.
I have the same amount of time given to me each day as everyone else does. It's how I prioritize the time that might be different. Besides my relationship with my Creator, my time spent with Athena is most important to me. More important than my job. More important than the money I make. More important than exercise. More important than my friends or other family members. And yes, even more important than Ashton, my darling little son.
I am not against nice items for those who can afford them and don't have to work insane hours to attain them. But I am slightly perplexed by those who work too many hours or have a long daily commute just so they can have "things," not realizing they are losing something that is even more valuable and precious.
2# SHARE SECRETS TOGETHER
I've got a secret and I'm not sharing. Actually, I have a lot of secrets. There are a lot of things that are only known to Athena and me. That keeps us close. I like it when Athena shares things with me that she doesn't share with others. It makes me feel special and unique in her eyes. I tell her things that I don't tell my friends or family. It's not like these are horrible things we have done that we can't tell others. I just want Athena to feel like she knows me better than anyone else.
Make your sweetheart feel special. Always share important things with them first. Let some things remain a secret between the two of you for a little while before letting the rest of the world know all about your personal life.
3# HAVE DATE NIGHTS
Without special time together, relationships can pull apart or simply become stale. But you can't simply replace doing nothing with doing the exact same thing week after week. The - oh-so-predictable - dinner and a movie can be all right if mixed up with some other types of dates. Here are a few suggestions: Bookstore, library, museum, zoo or park date, or together collect clothes for a shelter.
4# SPICE UP YOUR LOVE LIFE
If you find that sex is becoming very sporadic in your relationship (and you are not happy with that) consider scheduling "sex nights." Just like date nights, schedule one or two days each week for physical intimacy. Some people find the idea of planned sex off-putting at first, but later come to anticipate the weekly ritual. Having sex planned in advance makes for prolonged foreplay!
5# GET YOUR DEBT UNDER CONTROL
If you want to have a blissful relationship, you will need to get your debt under control (or at least a plan to do so). Otherwise, your debt will control you and affect you physically and psychologically.
When you get a paycheck, the first thing you should do is set aside money for charity/church. Doesn't seem logical, but it works. Sit down with your partner and discuss all aspects of your family budget. Only when you analyze your spending habits will you fully realize where you are wasting money. It’s a great opportunity to talk about your goals and dreams. Realize that frivolously spending money can be a sign of disrespect for your marriage and mate.
If you would like a bigger diamond ring or a fancier car, ask yourself why. Take a quick inventory of all the items you own but could really live without. Consider how much you paid for them. What if you didn't buy those items and had all that money in savings instead? Would it make a difference in how you view your job, your family and your future?
About the Author:
Michael Webb is the author of 50 Secrets of Blissful Relationships to help you create the perfect relationship. 50 Secrets Of Blissful Relationships
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Sadiyya Patel, Marriage Editor http://marriage.bellaonline.com
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