Whoever said that breaking up is hard to do was on to something. Ending a relationship is hardly ever a walk in the park. As they develop, relationships stimulate all kinds of emotions and as a result, it becomes almost inevitable that when a relationship fails, somebodyís feelings are bound to get hurt. Even when both people involved are absolutely convinced that ending the relationship is the best thing for everybody, there is still a certain element of sadness lurking somewhere in its demise.
If you are struggling to deal with a relationship that has recently ended and arenít sure how to get on with your life, check out the tips below for ideas on how to start moving on.
- Be mature about it - sometimes it is all too easy to let your emotions get the best of you. Regardless of the reason for the split and no matter whose decision it was to end the relationship, do your best to behave as maturely as possible. As tempting as it might be to try and seek revenge or to hold on to grudges and resentments, it simply isnít worth wasting any of your valuable time and energy on.
- Decide if you and your ex can be friends - while some people might be able to remain friends with their exes, most people eventually figure out that this is usually much easier said than done and that it is rarely worth the effort it requires. If the wound is still fresh, my advice is to steer clear of the ďletís be friendsĒ trap since it can often lead you to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. Instead make a clean break and avoid contact with your ex for at least one full year. If after that time you still feel like you might want to be friends, then go ahead and give it a try but more than likely you will find that you are better off without that person in your life at all.
- Identify the lesson and learn it - everyone that you cross paths with in your life is there for a reason. Every single person you come into contact with represents a new opportunity for you to learn something. Some of those lessons are so small you might not even realize that you learned anything at all. Others are so big that itís easy to get lost in translation. Take a look at the role you played in the relationship that has just ended. If you could go back and change things up, what would you do differently? Whatever answers you get from that inquiry, take that newfound knowledge and apply it to your next relationship. Remember that while you cannot change the past, the future is still yours to create. Draw a lesson from every experience and then apply it with every chance you get.