Announcing to family and friends that you have made the decision to adopt should be a wonderful, memorable experience. However, it's often followed by many questions, some more appropriate than others.
Don't let the questions take away from your excitement about adoption. You'll learn to know the difference between someone who truly wants to learn about adoption, and others than simply want to voice their opinions.
Here are a few common questions that parents who have adopted encountered along the way. There's hundreds more, but for the purpose of this article, let's focus on five common questions that are asked to potential adoptive parents.
1. Question: Why don't you just have one of your own? It's amazing what they can do now with infertility treatments!
Answer: Yes, it is true that there are amazing treatments for infertility out there. However, we have chosen adoption, and couldn't be happier with our decision!
2. Question: But what if the child doesn't look like you?
Answer: That's not why we are having a family. Not to mention the fact that I know of many families with biological children that don't look a thing alike.
3. Question: What if the birth parents change their mind?
Answer: It will be heartbreaking and devastating for us, but we have to hope that the best decision was made for the child and respect the birth parent's decision, because it is their decision.
4. Question: Why in the world are you adopting from that country...Why are you adopting an older child...Why are you adopting a child with special needs?
Answer: This is how we are going to start (or add to) our family.
5. Question: Isn't it so amazing that you're saving the world this way?
Answer: We're not adopting to save the world, we're adopting because we want a family, and adoption is the amazing journey that will make it possible.
It's important to understand that many people have honest questions and want to learn more about adoption. And, on the flip side, there are those that simply want to argue with you back and forth on the subject of adoption. The responses above are meant for the times when you don't want to or have the time to get into a lengthy discussion.