The Fire and the Rose, The Wedding of Spirituality and Sexuality

I love the lyrical tune, in which the song stylist bellows these pained confessions, “must I always remember? I can’t keep looking back. Must I always remind me, my goals are out of reach?" This song was an anthem for many. But, it is also a statement about how ineffective we can be in the business of living.

Bud Harris warns us in, "The Fire and the Rose," that we must learn to manage our own ability to transform and not solidify into an image of ourselves.
He stresses that we need to search inwardly for answers to causes of our anxieties and frustrations. It's not so much about where we go or what the people around us are doing, it's how we are able to transform within ourselves and our spirits. Throughout the book he dicussses the way we are collectively stuck in a way of life, and that individually we need to grow to 'grow' our society.

Dr. Harris, “As each new generation develops, we must find fresh interpretations of the truths or wisdom appropriate to the time we are living in. Otherwise we will loose our rootedness in the past and find ourselves, individually and collectively, in a state of consciousness full of desire but with no awareness of our soul. This can leave us vulnerable to outside pressures such as media and advertising and ultimately unable to build an identity that expresses who we really are.”

And, we leave our children without the tools of understanding. We live in a state of constant re-learning. In today’s climate, our kids need to be strong, and packin'...soulful wisdom. It's time to let go of shallow emotional self-preservation, so our hearts can open to life.

“When we loose touch with the spirit and the mysteries of life, we often replace them with religious or conventional rules- the ‘shoulds’ and ‘oughts‘-rules that offer little in terms of how to relate with the depth of our souls. Once we forget life is more profound than our practical, busy world acknowledges; we take the easy way out and abandon our responsibility to teach, guide, and inform, ourselves and our children,” states Harris.

Dr. Harris invites us to look at the way we are marched through our lives, (and are marching our children through theirs,) urged from the start to choose paths of practical conformity. Problems are to be clearly defined and solved. But, troubles begin to haunt us in our sex lives, our ability to relate to others, and with addictions.

Harris also reminds us that our overall fundamental operating principle should still be, “Know Thyself.” Instead of asking, “Do I love myself?” ask the question, “Can I give myself the love that I need?” Instead of asking, "What do I do to be good?" ask the question, "How do I live to bring meaning to my life?"

He advises that we search our passions, reactions, dreams, and fantasies for inward meaning, instead of acting out in sometimes, destructive ways. "In this process," Harris states, "not only are we learning to serve our Self, we are also transforming our culture." The process of living our lives is more important than the outcome, which ultimately, we do not have control over.

Harris suggests that the tension between desire and responsibility is a catalyst to grow through, and from which to evoke creativity, and positive outcomes. That, religion is about becoming, we are always becoming, and to stop becoming, is death.

Things do however become complicated, as our inner ‘Self’ needs to stand up to the emotion protecting, evaluations of our egos, and the ensuing crisis this creates. Living with authenticity can bring collisions between inner obligations and obligations to others and society. But, as Harris aptly points out, “only when our ego is able to dialogue with the Self can the true life of spirit (and genuine understanding) become expressed in our life.” And trust me, that's what we're all searching for. Harris says we should learn to allow the Self to guide us to ‘live into the answers.’ If we don't, we may 'unknowingly take a course that is destructive to ourselves and to society.'

Life is absurd and contradictory. Dr. Harris cautions us not to worry about assumed outcomes, as we follow our hearts paths. The outcome is not yet written. And, as we build our identities through achievement, it is necessary to habitually direct some of our energies inward to develop a fuller orientation toward a true, and rich life. Of course, we do have other options: stress, frustration, anxiety, or withdrawl, to name a few. Humans learn through shock and suprise. Harris states that the nature of life is such that paradox and metaphor are some of the best ways to get that learning jolt.

“We must consider if it’s time to change and grow, and if we are selling out the values of our hearts for practically and other people’s approval.” Dr Harris urges us to realize that to deal with today’s tough challenges, we must develop a more mature way to live within consciousness and spirituality.

After clearly explaining why we need to find our Self. Dr. Harris offers helpful tips for effective journaling, and Self connecting. This book is educating and filled great advice, to help organize our mental closets and spiritual homes. A recommended read; one you will re-read.