Guest Author - Lisa Polovin Pinkus
It is a story many moms are familiar with. By 9:00 am, she has already accomplished much more than the rest of the world. Mom has beckoned children to get dressed, made breakfast and filled lunch boxes, ensured that everyone has brushed their teeth, prodded the straggler several times to avoid any chance of tardiness, cleared breakfast and loaded the dishwasher, gathered backpacks, tied shoes, loaded everyone into the car, ran back inside for the forgotten water bottle and taken the children to school while still wearing her pajamas. If she is super-mom, she will have also exercised, showered, and dressed prior to the school carpool.
When a free moment comes, moms look up from their morning coffees and take a look at their lives. They realize how consuming childcare and household responsibilities are. They realize that if you donít pay careful attention, it is easy to lose a piece of yourSelf in the process. Momís passions and dreams are frequently placed on the back burner. It is the greatest act of selflessness and, yet, requires extreme diligence and calculation. After all, in order to be the best moms we can be, we must make sure we are feeding our own souls.
Many mothers consciously set aside their dreams and passions in order to make their children the top priority in their lives. When a moment opens up for mom to give something to herself, she often finds herself at a loss as to what to give. She may find it difficult to recall her passions. She may realize she is a changed woman but has no idea how to nourish herSelf anymore.
It is a continuous process of reconnecting, identifying and discovering where her inspiration lies. Moms must constantly reassess so that when the time comes, she is ready to pursue.
If you had unlimited time and money, what is it that you would do? In order to reconnect with your passions, you have to be willing to dream big. Start to create a list of things you would like to do. Do not exclude anything that comes to mind. This is only a list, not a commitment. This list is your deepest vision for who you want to be. What are the things that you enjoy doing? What are the un-pursued dreams that still live in your heart?
Take a look at the list you have created. Which item on your list has the biggest charge for you? Which goal is the most realistic right now? What does this dream mean to you and what would it mean to make it happen? What is holding you back? What are three things that need to take place in order to make this dream a reality? Are there people you know who can support you as you pursue this goal?
Every intention requires a blueprint with step-by-step instructions for accomplishing the task. Whether you have decided you want to (finally) clean out your basement or that you want to earn a Ph.D., it is important to create a plan marking each stage of your goal. We cannot do everything at once (despite what modern day motherhood wants us to believe), so itís important to create a realistic time line. Pick something that makes you feel alive. Slowly work it into your life until it becomes a habit. Consider the baby steps that will lead you to achievement, the timing of when you can realistically accomplish those steps, and how you will seek the support you need to succeed at your dream.
Daydream. What will it be like when you have accomplished your goal? Picture it happening. Imagine how your life will change. Create affirmations to help you stay on track. Find inspiring quotes and hang them in places you will see them throughout the day. Watch the growth and change that takes place. Celebrate each step along the way. Various studies show that writing down your goals and sharing them with other people will increase your chances for accomplishment.
So many of us spend time dreaming, evaluating, and creating but we never move beyond that into action. A plan is nothing if you donít take action. Construction and renovation are okay along the way but donít let them distract you from your goal. Find someone who will hold you accountable to your deadlines.
Dream, evaluate, and create. Design the life you want to live. Envision it. You are on the verge of a new Self. Take action. Action leads to progress, and progress takes you closer and closer to your goal.
Every mom deserves to pursue that which makes her heart sing (aside from her children, of course).