As with many things, one of the key things that will make a huge difference, is starting with high-quality tools. Don't go out and buy the 'best bargain' you can find. Get a good, high-quality razor. This also does not necessarily mean going and buying the one with the highest price tag! Some people prefer electric razors, some triple-blade hand razors, some single-blade. The best advice there is to find the right kind for you. If using a conventional razor, though, remember to change the blades often. Some recommend as often as every 2-3 shaves if you have coarse hair. Otherwise, the blades become nicked and may cut the skin more. A good rule of thumb is if you have to use any pressure, you need to replace the blades.
Before you shave, you should soak the hairs for at least three minutes in warm water; it softens the hair and relaxes the skin. This means that after the shower is a wonderful time to shave. Since you shouldn't shave within 20-30 minutes after waking up (your skin gets slightly puffy while you sleep), this is likewise a good time. If you have coarse hair or really want a clean shave, using hair conditioner on your facial hair in the shower may be beneficial. Exfoliating your skin before shaving can also help attain a closer, cleaner shave; it softens the hairs more, and removes dead skin cells. It also helps prevent ingrown hairs if you use it daily.
You should always use some sort of shaving gel or other 'foamy' shaving product. Allow it to soak into the hairs for a few minutes before beginning to actually shave. If you have lots of problems, you can even add a dime-sized amount of conditioner to your shaving gel, or apply a layer of skin lotion before the shaving gel. Whether you should shave with or against the grain seems to be quite a controversy; the conclusion seems to be that against the grain will give a somewhat closer shave, but going with the grain will cause less irritation and ingrown hairs. Use one hand to pull the skin taut, and use the other to stroke with the razor. Be sure to rinse the blade with water in between each stroke. If you have sensitive skin or if irritation is a problem, do not use any repeat strokes, as this increases irritation; if you miss a hair or two, use a mini-trimmer or tweezers on the stray hair, not your razor (this is especially important with conventional razors). And be sure to go slowly! Going too fast will cause you to miss more hairs and cause more irritation.
After you shave, be sure to use a good-quality moisturizer or skin oil, or aloe vera if you have very sensitive skin or irritation problems. Do not use an aftershave or anything else containing alcohol or menthol. While the 'cool' sensation may be pleasant, they actually cause irritation and can make razor burn worse. Some people feel that rubbing the shaved area with ice afterwards can help with razor burn; this makes sense, as the cold will help close the pores.
For a natural, soothing after-shave formula, soak 1 tablespoon each of comfrey leaves, chamomile, and calendula flowers in 1/2 cup witch hazel; allow it to steep for about two weeks. Then strain out the herbs and combine 1/4 cup of this infusion with 1/4 cup of rosewater, 1/4 teaspoon vegetable glycerin(optional), and 5 drops each of lavender and sandalwood essential oil. Apply liberally to shaved areas.
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