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BellaOnline's Stress Management Editor

How to Fill an Empty Nest

Many of you might have been absorbed by your teenís college application process and then with great relief, celebrating the admissions process. After all the energy expended, the simple truth sets in that you are embarking on a new life phase as an empty nester. You have built your life around the kids and now because you have done your job right, the last little bird is about to fly away. You look at your spouse and wonder how the two of you are going to live alone together. What you fear most is boredom with all this newly found togetherness as a couple. You are not the same bright-eyed person you once were when you first got married and neither is he.

Itís time to get reacquainted with yourself first and then with your spouse. Losing interest in one another is not inevitable and please donít fall for the something-better-out-there-is-waiting-for-you story; thatís just Hollywood. This is the time to get in touch with the deeper reasons for your unhappiness: Aging, forgotten dreams, shallow friendships and a lack of self-care.

Itís time to decide what makes you happy, what you want to experience. Also, it helps to know your validation issues like who and what validates you. Are you worried if you disappeared tomorrow, no one would miss you? How can you cultivate a feeling that you still matter and that you can contribute?

If you are apprehensive about being alone with him, it is most likely that you are worried about being alone with yourself. If you think that you are falling out of love with him, you are probably falling out of love with yourself. So, let your partner help you. Let him support you during your soul-searching journey. Instead of looking at him and thinking, ďI have outgrown you.Ē Why not share your personal growth with him?

Here are some simple suggestions to refill the empty nest with a loving relationship. Small changes and simple living will help you to find new meaning in your life.
For more, read my book, Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind and Soul, specifically Chapter 6 - For the Times You Live a Life of Quiet Desparation, Chapter 10 - How to Let Go, and Chapter 11 - How to Have Fun. To listen to archived radio shows with guest experts visit Turn On Your Inner Light Radio Show

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Content copyright © 2013 by Debbie Mandel. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Debbie Mandel. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Debbie Mandel for details.

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