Queer, homo, lesbian, gay, fag, faggot, bi... that’s me. Say any of those words to the average person and what’s the first thing they think of? Sex. Yet being homosexual/gay has as much to do with sex as being heterosexual/str8. But people can't seem to get beyond the images of man on man or woman on woman sex out of their minds when they hear those words. In the case of some religious people, those images come to mind whenever they hear of a tragedy to most people, and a queerdemic to these.

You know what I am talking about. You've heard it, read it, seen it on TV. It's called the Blame Game. Imagine a dartboard on a wall with someone's picture on it. Whenever something goes wrong in the owners life, they throw a dart at the board blaming the person who's picture is attached at the moment. Well in the Blame Game scenario, it is the face of a queer that is the center of the owner's hate and frustration.

We have seen Robertson blame gays for 9/11. Christians blame gays for the destruction of the biblical towns Sodom and Gomorrah. Blame the gays for the impurity during Hitler's reign, amongst others. And now, Katrina. It's them queers fault. Forget that not only Southern Decadence happens in NOLA. There are many other parties there like Mardi Gras and others. Hell, your kid gets a splinter, blame the gays for being the thorn in the side of society.

But where does it all stem from? Hate? Ignorance? The bible? I say it stems from fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the non-understandable. Fear of the different. Fear of being wrong. Fear of us being right. Fear of what might actually turn you on. Yes you heard me. Some of the worst hate-mongers of queer folk are actually closeted queers themselves. But most of the time it is fear of the unknown or what is different. Many Christians and other people of faith, cannot come to terms with who we are. They cannot fathom that we are happy, loving, sane individuals who want and need the same things as them. They say we are ruining the sanctity of marriage. Why can't we have the same sanctity to our relationships when they last just as long if not longer than theirs?

So how do we win the Blame Game? Through education. Through counter-demonstrations that are civil and not in-your-face. WHAT! No pride marches and Southern Decadence. No White parties, pink parties, parties at all. No I am not saying that. I am saying we counter their hate with education. We counter their ignorance with enlightenment. Only then will we succeed. If Phelps is coming to your neighborhood, get pledges from people for sitting there in silent protest and then donate the money to AIDS Hospices and other queer charities IN Phelps’s name. Educate people on what it is like being queer. How we don't choose a life of hate and fear. That is how we succeed.

This queer only made one choice about his lifestyle.. and that was to accept who he was. I am a happy, well-educated, emotionally-stable, able bodied gay man who loves who he is, and loves the life he leads. I welcome everyone else to feel the same way and stop playing those peoples Blame Game.

Jase ;0)

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Jason P. Ruel
Editor, Gay Lesbian News @ BellaOnline.com



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