Gay Causes - What Made Me Gay
Recently I have overheard conversations and had conversations myself about what makes a person gay. Many of you know I am part of a GLBT Speaker’s Bureau where we go into classrooms and such and hold frank and honest conversations with people. Many professors at our local University request these panel discussions as part of their class in order to bring in different outside viewpoints that are relevant to what they are teaching. I have been to Psychology classes, Sociology, Social Work, Diversity, Religion, and many other classes. It never changes. One of the first questions is “what made me gay?”.
I don’t mean to laugh when someone asks me so I do it internally. I want to turn around and ask them what made them the way they are. What made their hair brown, black, red, etc. What made their eyes brown, green, blue, gray. What made them fat. What made them skinny. What made them ignorant.
Why does something always have to make us gay. Why cannot a person fathom the fact that we are gay, no matter what may have caused us to be this way. I believe G-d made me in His image, and that image happened to be Gay. Do I say G-d is Gay… no, I said He made me in His image. If one is to believe G-d is infallible, then one should accept that His creation is not wrong.
Others use the whole molestation issue. A Priest molesting me made me gay is a current answer. If child molestation made anyone anything, it would be that it made us more aware of sex and how evil people really can be. I have a confession to make. I was raped twice, a victim of sexual molestation by both sexes for numerous years, and have experimented with other children in sexual manner. Most of this happened when I was a child and teen. One rape occurred in my late teens and early 20’s time period. If anything, being molested would make me not want to be like the person who molested me. The majority of my molesters were male. STRAIGHT/HETEROSEXUAL MALE. Yes, heterosexual. Like most research will tell you. Most pedophiles (those who get sexual gratification from children’s images and interaction with children) and molesters (those who act on the sexual fantasies involving children) are heterosexual, male, white, middle-class, married with children, and over 24 years of age. Did these men make me gay… no. Nothing made me gay. I am what I am because I am what I am. How simple the world would be if it could just realize that we are what we are because we are what we are. Why try to break everything down and find a “cause” for everything. Accept diversity. Accept difference. If it isn’t harmful to the health of someone then don’t worry. And anyone will be hard-pressed to say that being gay is harmful to someone else’s health.
Pedophiles and child molesters are sick individuals. Some are men, some are women. We need to protect our children from them. But in protecting them, we need to be careful where we point the finger of blame. Do not blame the gay man just because you don’t agree with his sexual partner. Blame the person who abuses the child, where the blame actually belongs. And in the same breath, a victim usually rejects those who are like the attacker. Wouldn't it be more obvious that I would want to have relations with women, verses relations with men. Why would I go for the same sex that victimized me. No hero worship or battered syndrom here. I liked boys before I was abused and raped. That is what counts.. not what made me who I was, whether that be gay or straight.
You won’t protect your son by kicking out the gay male teachers, coaches, counselors, doctors, nurses. The same with your daughters. Because if you did there would be a shortage of everything. And while we are at the whole they made me gay blame game.. let’s ship all the gays and lesbians to an island where they can die off one by one! Or better yet, just burn us at the stake!
Jason P. Ruel
Editor, Gay Lesbian News @ BellaOnline.com
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