While it's difficult at best to type out a family tree without use of a pictorial diagram, it is still even worse to have to sort out the comings and goings of soap opera characters. Ah ... if we could all have such exciting and colorful lives!

The Cranes are a devious bunch, with a long and proverbial chip on their shoulders. Who knows why it is so, it just is; with each new Crane feeling it is necessary to carry the burden of that chip and pass it down to their offspring. Sort of a twisted legacy.

So where did it all begin? Why, Alistair Crane, of course!

Alistair Crane married Katherine Barrett and they had a son named Julian Linus Crane. Alistair was abusive towards Katherine and she fled the country. Their marriage had ended.

Their son, Julian, was just like Dad - devious in every way. He had an affair with Eve Johnson and they had a son, whom they somehow misplaced.

Julian decided he needed to be married and so chose Ivy Winthrop to be his betrothed. Together, they had three children: Fancy, Pretty, (they sound like pet names) and Nicholas Foxworth (a.k.a. Fox). Julian divorced Ivy after she duped him into thinking that Ethan was his son.

While he was celebrating in Bermuda, Theresa sought him out to convince him to adopt Ethan. They got stupid and got married - it was later annulled.

Julian then decided there were just not enough little Cranes in the world, so he had a fling with Tabitha and together, they produced Endora (does he even acknowledge her existence?).

He then married Rebecca in 2001. No children ... yet!

Julian has a sister, Sheridan, who until recently, was kind of a nice gal. Sheridan never knew who she was from one minute to the next, but she did know that she loved Luis Lopez-Fitzgerald. She had an affair with Luis and they had a child named Marty. Sadly, Marty passed away. Instead of marrying her beloved, Luis, she went for his brother Antonio who also has since passed away. Again, she does not choose Luis as her next husband, instead, she married Chris Boothe. It would only be fair to note that she actually loved Chris. Their first pregnancy ended in miscarriage and the second pregnancy produced little James. She did marry Luis - too bad she was still knowingly married to Chris. Now that Chris is gone - who will Sheridan spend her lonely days with?

Another notable love interest for Alistair was with a psychiatric ward patient Edna Wallace. They had a daughter named Beth.

Alistair once again planted his seed in a most violent and brutal way - he raped Liz Sanbourne at her home as revenge. She was only fourteen when it happened and after she had their son Chad, the rape left her unable to bare any more children. She gave Chad up for adoption to the Harris'.

As a side note, Alistair also had a turn with Theresa. The marriage produced no children and the marriage lasted until his death.

Who's next on Julian's hit-list? If he's smart, he will fight for Eve. She truly loves him and he needs a good woman to ground him a little. As for Sheridan ... she needs to turn herself around and put her marriage back together. What she had with Luis is turning her into a monster. She needs to rethink her destiny!