Guest Author - L. Drea Strasser

So you're seeing someone. Things have gotten progressively more serious. You begin to wonder: how much of a commitment should I make? All of these vows rush through your head-- To have and to hold, check. In sickness and in health, check. Then the big one hits you. Till death do you part. Aagh! That's FOREVER! Just how long is FOREVER?

Once you stop hyperventilating, you can put things in perspective more easily. Call me a cynic. But when these vows were created, people only lived for 30-40 years. So FOREVER was much shorter. I mean, no wonder divorce rates keep going up...we keep living longer! But I digress.

When you finally stand at that altar, gazing deep into the eyes of your beloved, your intentions are to stay with him or her for the rest of your life. You intend to feel the same way about her and with her that you do on that day.

No one really knows if that is going to happen. It's all about INTENTION. Love is always changing, like everything else. But you are making a commitment to work through the hard times and try to achieve that ultimate goal. That's what marriage is all about-- making a commitment to try and make the other person happy. For how long is not determined really by the fact that you are married, but by your willingness to be flexible and adaptable in your love. Your roles may change, but as long as the changes are acceptable to both people, your love can endure.

So when it comes to deciding to take that next step to engagment and then marriage, don't panic. Don't think about what you are going to do 10, 20, or even 50 years from now. Do as you've been doing in your relationship so far: take it one day at a time, one challenge at a time. And renew that INTENTION to love her and make her happy every day. And don't forget to breathe.