logo
g Text Version
Beauty & Self
Books & Music
Career
Computers
Education
Family
Food & Wine
Health & Fitness
Hobbies & Crafts
Home & Garden
Money
News & Politics
Relationships
Religion & Spirituality
Sports
Travel & Culture
TV & Movies

dailyclick
Bored? Games!
Nutrition
Postcards
Take a Quiz
Rate My Photo

new
Painting
Heart Disease
Horror Literature
Dating
Hiking & Backpacking
SF/Fantasy Books
Healthy Foods


dailyclick
All times in EST

Clairvoyance: 08:00 PM

Full Schedule
g
g Domestic Violence Site

BellaOnline's Domestic Violence Editor

g

Do You See What I See? Personal Story

Guest Author - Jeanette Stingley

Guest Author Ly Marlow, printed with her permission. Please see my review of her award winning book Color Me Butterfly

One of the darkest memories that I’m often reminded this time of the year is a story about my aunt and uncle who’d come to my grandmother’s home for a holiday gathering. I remember looking at my aunt wondering if anyone saw what I saw. Everyone seemed to be enjoying the festivities, while I, young and naïve, sat staring at my aunt, wondering, “Do you see what I see?”, it reminded me of the Christmas carol.

But this was no little lamb, no dancing star, no kite, no song high above the trees.

What did I see? I saw my aunt sitting on the couch, quiet in her own spirit, her face black and blue on one side, her eye closed, clumsily covered in makeup.

No one said anything. No one did anything. No one seemed to notice, but me.

Do you see what I see?

The holiday season, though joyous, is also a time that is very stressful and leads to greater rates of domestic violence. Not to mention the added pressures of a recession that makes it even more daunting. Not only can there be an increase in domestic violence incidents, they also sometimes go unreported, more often than not, given the holiday season. Besides, it’s supposed to be a time of families coming together, happy homes, holiday festivities. Who wants to ruin this picturesque occasion? Who wants to be sitting in police barracks, standing before a judge, or worse yet, sitting behind the unfamiliar walls of a shelter? Not I. And certainly not the countless number of women, like my aunt, who come to the holiday party, covered in foundation and blush. Having come from four generations of mothers and daughters, all of whom who had once sat on that same couch, I certainly can appreciate why any woman would rather hide behind a mask, rather than report it. Shame brought us there, but silence kept us there.

If you are my aunt, know that there is help. Know that you do not have to sit there covered in secrecy and shame. Know that the silence, perpetuated, can be broken, that the chains of shame can be disbanded. There are so many waiting to help you. Reach out, talk to someone, tell somebody. Let today be your day. Call 1-800-799-SAFE, the National Domestic Violence Hotline and speak with someone in confidence.

And if you are the one sitting across from that couch, watching the proverbial mask, ignoring the obvious . . . Do you see what I see?

L.Y. Marlow, Author/Founder, Saving Promise
www.savingpromise.us
www.colormebutterfly.com

About L.Y. Marlow and Color Me Butterfly:
As a survivor, an advocate, a mother, and woman who comes from four generations of mothers and daughters who suffered and survived more than 60 years of domestic violence and abuse, L.Y. Marlow has decided to not only break the cycle of domestic violence in her family but to transform their pain into a “Promise for Change”. L.Y. Marlow portrays her family’s story through her award winning novel Color Me Butterfly, the true story of her family’s journey from tragedy to triumph. L.Y.’s mission began when the life of her granddaughter named Promise was threatened in a domestic violence dispute and L.Y. could not let this social disease afflict Promise, now the fifth generation. This is the story that inspired Saving Promise.
This site needs an editor - click to learn more!

Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to Twitter Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to Facebook Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to MySpace Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to Del.icio.us Digg Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to Yahoo My Web Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to Google Bookmarks Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to Stumbleupon Add Do+You+See+What+I+See%3F+Personal+Story to Reddit




RSS | Related Articles | Editor's Picks Articles | Top Ten Articles | Previous Features | Site Map


For FREE email updates, subscribe to the Domestic Violence Newsletter


Past Issues


print
Printer Friendly
bookmark
Bookmark
tell friend
Tell a Friend
forum
Forum
email
Email Editor


Content copyright © 2013 by Jeanette Stingley. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Jeanette Stingley. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact BellaOnline Administration for details.

g


g features
Vermont Resources for Domestic Violence

Children Living in a Violent Home

South Dakota Resources for Domestic Violence

Archives | Site Map

forum
Forum
email
Contact

Past Issues
memberscenter


vote
Poetry
Daily
Weekly
Monthly
Less than Monthly



BellaOnline on Facebook
g


| About BellaOnline | Privacy Policy | Advertising | Become an Editor |
Website copyright © 2013 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.


BellaOnline Editor