I am not an expert on religion or a cleric of any sort. I am simply a woman of faith who has faced infertility for many years. No matter what religion you belong to, or even if you are person of faith without religious ties, infertility can force you to look deep within yourself for answers.

Most of the world's religions teach that family matters. When you can not have a child it can make you feel as if you are breaking a chain. Does your family tree end with you? How can you pass along the faith of your fathers or the wisdom of your ancestors without children? How can you leave a legacy without a child who will one day have children of their own? Infertility can leave you feeling lonely and alone.

One way to counter this feeling of aloneness is to volunteer. Working with children may be too painful for you, but you can always find a place where your time and talents will make a difference in the world. This can help you to find meaning and take you outside of yourself to ease the pain. If you can handle working with children, or on their behalf through a foundation or other charity, you may find that this helps to give you a sense of accomplishment.

For many couples facing infertility, it can be difficult to maintain regular attendance at religious meetings. This can make the feeling of aloneness even more profound. Whether you meet in a mosque, a synagogue or a church, chances are you'll feel out of place without children of your own. You may be able to locate a local or online group of women who are of your faith who also deal with infertility. This can be tremendously comforting to find this kind of support.

It is easy to feel that infertility is some kind of punishment from God. We need not look far in the scriptures to find references to children as a gift from God. However, we can also look to the scriptures for reassurance that we are not alone in this painful path of infertility. Abraham and Sarah, Rachel, Hannah and others suffered from infertility, even as the scriptures outline their faith. Through their stories we can know that infertility is not a punishment and that we should not give up hope.

When the spectre of infertility weighs heavily on my heart I comfort myself with these thoughts:

"Only God can know the full plan for my life. Only by trusting in Him can I reach my potential. I do not know what miracles I may be a part of in this part of my life that would not be possible if I were raising a child right now. In due time that child may come. If not, I will know that I have done all I can to welcome that child and all I can to follow His plan."

The following books may of value to you on your journey:

From a Christian perspective:




From a Jewish Perspective: