You probably want a garden that satisfies you and makes you smile when you step into the yard, but how do you create the perfect garden for you? First, look at gardens and yards as you travel from one destination to another. Did the bridge over the dry bed make you want to pull over and stare for awhile or did you think “I’d never do that in my yard?” Make a note of any garden features you liked and what you didn’t like. Next, pull out all the Home and Garden magazines and books on your shelves. (If you’re like me, they are legion. If not, you may need to go to the library and check out a stack of material.) Flip through your books and magazines and mark pages you like. Finally, look at any of your existing gardens and see what you like and dislike about them.

With your resources in hand, it is time to decide what you want in your garden. Look at your lists and pictures and see what themes are repeated over and over again. For instance, I am drawn to arbors covered in climbing roses, cottage style gardens, and slate paths. I rarely long for a Zen garden, though I enjoy visiting them at other people’s homes. However, my brother picked raked gravel patios, Japanese Maples, a fountain, and simple plantings that are found in Zen gardens over and over again. If I would have planted his dream garden or he had planted mine because we thought we were supposed to garden that way, or if we bought one element of the other person's garden and tried to fit the garden around it, we would not have felt the peace and satisfaction we have with our gardens.

Now that you know what you want, look at your yard. You may find that you will need to tweak your ideas. For example, if you live in full shade and want a cottage garden that does well in full sun, you can still fit the important elements into your garden, but you won't be able to have sun loving plants. For instance, you can still put a picket fence, informal pathways, and lush plantings in your garden, but the plants will be Hostas, May Apples and Astilbe instead of Delphiniums, Roses, and Hollyhocks.

Your final step is to think about childhood memories. According to Digging Deep, by Fran Sorin, including these memories in your garden design will give you a garden that truly makes you happy. It can be something quite simple, like picking peas with a beloved grandparent, or smelling roses in your neighbor’s garden beds, but try to incorporate the memory into your design.