Guest Author - Cynthia Parker
Okay, its time to stir up the opinions and rattle the cages. I promised that I was going to write on “dating issues” and here it goes. I promised that we would discuss interracial dating, age differences, sexuality, parental dating, etc. I had hoped that I would get some responses from other parents before I wrote the first article, but it seems that I am to be the first to test the waters. Well, I am diving on in….
I don’t know how many of you have ever listened to Dr. Laura Schlessinger, but she is NOT one of my favorites. However, once in a while, she says something with which I totally agree. Her stance on interracial dating is one of those times.
A woman called in to Dr. Laura and told her that she was very upset with her daughter for dating a black man. She used all the “excuses” she could come up with - feeling sorry for the “mixed” children, societal stigma, etc. She claimed that she herself was not prejudice, but that she didn’t want her daughter hurt by the prejudice of others. Her final stance was that everyone should stick to his or her own race.
Now, I well know that there are those of you out there that - for one reason or another - agree with this woman. But Dr. Laura had only one question, “Don’t you think that the most important thing about the man that your daughter selects is how he treats your daughter?” She went on to say that if the woman didn’t want her daughter to learn to hate, then she shouldn’t be teaching it at home.
WooHoo! Break out the band! Dr. Laura and I actually agree. You see, I don’t care if the man is black, white, orange, or purple polka-dotted as long as he treats my daughter with love and respect. I want her to be happy and to know what it is to be honestly loved. The man that makes her happy has my heart as well as hers.
As for the arguments of this woman - First, children are going to be “picked on” for one reason or another. It happens to all of them - there are “nerds”, “dumb jocks”, “easy cheerleaders”, and a variety of other epitaphs that follow our children around every day of their lives. If they are not picked on because of one thing, another will be found. So the theory that “mixed” children have it harder is not sound. Second, society is full of stigmas. Sooner or later, there will be one that applies to each of us. Being true to ourselves is the key. If we do that, then what society thinks will be irrelevant. And the list goes on…
I do realize that there are arguments on both sides of the fence against interracial couples. I challenge those of you who are against interracial dating/marriages to take a good look at your reasons. If they are the least bit born out of hate or fear, then abandon them. They will only cause more harm than good. If you can come up with a reason that isn’t born out of some type of prejudice, then email me because I want the chance to defend against it!
Until then, I suggest that the power of love is greater than the hate of society. For all of those that are true to the love that you feel in your heart regardless of the opinions of others, I commend you and wish you great happiness!
P.S. Come on in! The water is fine!