One of hardest things you can do is say no. It's even harder saying it to certain people. Who they are depends on you. Maybe it is your spouse, partner or parent. Can you say no to your boss, neighbor, child, friend or coworker? If not you are not alone.

Saying no is an art. You can give a direct answer which is assertive and to the point, or an indirect answer which is what most people give. Sometimes people can't do either of these, they just go with a dishonest response and hope it sounds good.

For example: you are invited to the ballet or a ball game you have no interest in going but don't know how to respond. You can say that you have plans, but that answer could backfire if asked about the plans or months later how you enjoyed it. You can buy time by giving an indirect response such as 'I'll check my calendar."; "I am not sure what my partner has planned." or something similar. Or you give the assertive reply and simply say "thank you I appreciate the invitation but I really don't enjoy ballet or ball games."

Saying no does not have to be hard but we often make it so for a number of reasons: don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, afraid to say no to the boss, never able to say no to parent, can't deny your children, etc.

Learn how to say no with style and finesse. Be open and honest; don't make excuses, not liking something or not wanting to do it is a good enough reason to say no.

Remember to respect yourself enough to say no and respect the one doing the inviting enough to think they will understand and accept your reason.

Check your local library or go to Amazon.com below for one or both of these recommended books to help you to understand and learn the power of saying no.

No! How One Simple Word Can Transform Your Life

This book has references to the bible Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life