How to Clean Your Room
Goal: Collect all the samples of mold, mildew and decay and release them back into their native environment.
Procedure: Mold, mildew and decay samples can be found hiding in drink cans, food wrappers and dishes, piles of dirty clothes, piles of clean clothes that have not been put away, mountains of shoes, and the deep caverns and potato fields under your bed. Mold, mildew and decay thrive in all these places, but should be released to their native environment – the trash can.
Time: one-day to five days, depending on the density of the room
Goal: Become a fashion model and try on every piece of clothing in your closet, in your drawers, on your chairs, desk, floor, and under your bed. Dispose of the clothes which do not fit your fab-style.
Procedure: Place three baskets on (or as close to ‘on’) your bedroom floor. Have a roll of plastic bags available. Clothes that are too big, too small, or just ‘ew’; place in the first basket to be given away. Clothes that are excessively ripped, torn and worn (or are really embarrassing) place in the second basket to be thrown away. Clothes that still fit and you like, place in the third basket to keep.
When a basket gets full, pour the contents into a garbage bag and label it (Donate, Trash, or Keep)
Take the trash bags out and throw them away.
Wash, fold, and re-bag the donations. There are many places which accept clothing – thrift shops, church service centers, the Salvation Army, the Kidney Foundation, etc. Once you have decided where they should go, take them there.
Wash, fold, iron, organize, and hang up or put away all the clothes that fit.
Time: one day to one week, depending on the amount of clothes
Goal: Give your shoes the third degree.
Procedure: Bring back the three baskets and trash bags.
Try on every pair of shoes you have. Be sure to check all the usual hiding places – shoes love to hide.
Put all shoes that have lost their ‘partner in crime’ or are too decayed, moldy, gross, etc. in the trash basket and throw them away.
Put all shoes that no longer fit or were just a bad idea but are still in good shape in the donations basket and give them away.
Put all shoes that fit and you don’t mind people seeing you wearing them in the keep basket.
Wash and dry all soft soled shoes (athletic, slippers, etc.)
Spray other shoes with a disinfectant or deodorizing spray.
Organize your shoes. Begin with matching each shoe, then put all the sports shoes together, then all the fancy ones, etc. Shoe racks are a wonderful invention: use one!
Time: three hours to one day
See, you now have a clean room and you didn’t even have to move!
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