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BellaOnline's Dating Editor

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Setting Reasonable Expectations

Guest Author - Kristina de la Cal

One of the most challenging obstacles facing daters today is the tendency that both they and their romantic partners have to over-inflate expectations. Not to say that there is anything wrong with setting reasonable standards for the kind of qualities that you would like to find in an ideal mate. As a matter of fact, not knowing exactly what you are looking for in a partner would certainly make the dating process much more complicated than it needs to be. However, setting standards that are unreasonably high can also prove to be a pretty substantial hindrance in the dating game. Though it isnít easy to find that middle ground, there are some things that you can do to ensure that the dating expectations you set are well suited to you and your particular needs. In an effort to avoid setting yourself up for disappointment, consider the suggestions below as you review the rationales behind your own dating expectations.

  • Recognize and accept that people are human - Perfection is nothing more than an illusion and one that will inevitably result in significant disappointments for those who insist on expecting it from fallible creatures. Give yourself and your date permission to be perfectly imperfect.

  • Focus on qualities of substance - While physical attraction is important, there is a lot more to chemistry than looks alone. Try not to judge a book by its cover. Look past appearances and instead concentrate on seeing people for who they really are as evidenced through character and personal values.

  • Go with the flow - Try not to rush things or demand too much too soon from a new relationship. The dating process should be filled with good times not high stakes so for best results, avoid putting too much pressure on yourself or your date. Also, remember that while passion is fleeting, emotional connections are usually built to last so invest a little time in getting to know your partner before becoming physically intimate.
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Content copyright © 2014 by Kristina de la Cal. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Kristina de la Cal. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Danielle Deovlet for details.

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