It was time for the “family meeting.” The will was read years ago, but the estate remained unsettled. This is a sensitive task for any family and famously so in Irish families, when long-standing feuds are often started. When there are nearly a dozen brothers and sisters, things can get a little dicey. Dad provided for his children as best he could during his life and, optimistically, included in his will “those who may yet be born.” He made outrageous statements in this will, just as he had throughout his life: “I may make a list deciding who should get what, but then again I may not. If nobody finds a list within 30 days, forget about it.” I could see him amusing himself something mighty with images of furtive pawing through drawers and puttering through the contents of closets. If nothing else, it should finally get those cabinets tidied up. It did.

There were two issues yet unsettled: the house and the sentimental objects (read this to mean everything in the house.) The issue of the house was dealt with in the will. He wanted the house kept for anyone who needed it for a generous period after his death. After that time, the house should be sold and the money from the sale divided with an extra share to one disabled brother.

The meeting went well. The details of the house sale were ironed out. It was decided that the “sentimental” items would go into a lottery, kind of like the way we handle gifts at Christmas. All the pieces are numbered and each person picks their numbers. Then we switch with those willing for what we really wanted. One of the boys said that Mom’s collection of Waterford, Belleek,and Donegal Parian—the contents of her beautiful china cabinet—was worth a lot of money. The sisters exhaled in one voice, PRICELESS, and the clueless brother sat back down, realizing that he had stepped far out of line. Mom’s Waterford is not for sale. Our parents were hospitable people. None of us could count the people who spent their first nights---sometimes years---in America in our house, and so there is a lot of Irish crystal and china in that cabinet. It will be painful to see the pieces separated. They’ve been together a long, long time. Even so, we all feel the meeting went well. We feel like a family again.

As tough as it is to realize that there are none of us going to live forever, do everybody you love a favor and make out a will. Don’t be afraid to put yourself into it, your personality. You’re doing it for your family and when you’re gone, every word you said will become absolute truth. The Irish can sometimes have complications with wills as so many have lived and worked abroad. To help handle the various issues of our peripatetic race, check out https:www.global-wills.com as they can help with writing wills whether you’re in Ireland, the U.S., Australia, or Britain. Don’t leave it to the young ones to try to sort out alone. Their own day will come, later.