Guest Author - Kristina de la Cal
On one hand, romantic involvements with members of the same sex can help to alleviate many of the gender-related misunderstandings that often plague heterosexual relationships. On the other, the blending of such similar traits can also lead to double trouble, especially where women are concerned. Not only do lesbians have to deal with a double dose of monthly mood swings but they also need to be wary of a common lesbian affliction known as U-Haul Syndrome.
U-Haul Syndrome is a well-known concept within the lesbian community, where it is frequently joked about. Its symptoms include jumping into relationship mode at warp speed and moving in together after a very short period of time spent dating. Also referred to as the ďurge to mergeĒ, U-Haul Syndrome has been known to cause significant trouble for many lesbians. The sharing of living quarters and intertwining of finances very early on in a new relationship runs the risk of leaving both women with an awful lot of baggage to sort out if things donít work out as planned.
Despite its negative reputation, however, not all cases of U-Haul Syndrome are doomed to failure. I believe that the chances of success for any relationship, whether U-Hauled or not, are almost entirely dependent on the specific circumstances of each case and the intentions of the people involved. If a new lesbian coupleís decision to U-Haul it after a few weeks is motivated primarily by an interest in the convenience of sharing financial burdens, the romantic forecast for that couple is likely to be more stormy than anything else. The same goes for new lesbian couples operating under the assumption that cohabitation is synonymous with commitment. Sometimes, however, it is possible to meet someone so special and that makes your heart sing like it never has before so that then suddenly, everything else just seems to fall right into place and it doesnít make much sense to wait for the happily ever after to begin. The heart knows when it is with the right person and when it isnít. The tricky part is being honest enough with oneself to make the right choices even when they arenít the easiest ones.