Almost nothing can start a husband and wife disagreement faster than a discussion about money matters; especially when one family member does not work, or makes less than his or her mate. Stay-at-home moms or dad may feel like an unequal partner when it comes to family money. So how do you handle it? The first rule would have to be do not allow yourself to feel insecure. Take some to action to make yourself feel secure and comfortable in your relationship.

If you are married to someone who insists on handling all the finances, he or she may unintentionally behave badly (i.e., I make more money, therefore, I'm entitled to spend more or criticize your spending.)Speak up in a nice way.

Do you feel guilty about spending money because you fear you will hear about it later. For instance, you are questioned about your purchase, "Why did you buy those shoes or that sweater, didn't I just have to pay $150 in dental bills, for you (or the children) just this month?" This makes you very much aware that you are not bringing in any money to the household. It's hard to feel empowered when someone continually undermines you, even when what you do at home is priceless.

If you do not make as much as your spouse or you are a stay-at-home, you will have to recognize that your contributions are significant:

• If you are asked for advice concerning a financial matter, don't say, "I don't know honey, why don't you decide." Obviously your mate wanted this to be a shared decision.
  
  
• If your mate is the one who does the bills, ask how the budget looks for the month to get a dialogue going.
  
  
• Try not to feel like you are rocking the boat when you ask questions about household finances.
  
  
• When you are complimented about the house or dinner. Don't start any sentence with "Oh, it's just..." Instead say thank you. If it was a difficult or time-consuming task, say so. Not as a complaint, as a fact.
  

And, finally, you can always start a home business.