Guest Author - Lauren Evans
BNTM is back for a fourth cycle, and there are some changes afoot.
The first, and most major change, is that judges Paula Hamilton and Jonathan Phang have been replaced by Huggy Ragnarsson and Gerry DeVeaux. The new flock are not yet living up to Paula’s bizarre antics (such as getting naked for no apparent reason in the middle of a photoshoot) or Jonathan’s scathing criticism of the wannabe supermodels. It’s unfortunate that someone didn’t see fit to take the opportunity to remove Lisa Snowdon as presenter at the same time, as she seems to have devised a whole new batch of even more smug and superior expressions for our viewing displeasure this cycle.
This year also sees more girls than ever before as 14 hopefuls battle it out for the title of Britain’s Next Top Model and a host of modelling prizes. Having received criticism last year for featuring girls either “too old” or “too fat” to genuinely make it in modelling, the judges either haven’t taken much notice of this or are fighting a losing battle when it comes to finding 14 attractive women in Britain. It will come as no surprise to fans of the show that this year’s contestants are an uninspiring bunch – here’s my rundown of the ones to watch.
Martha Braddell – The posh whiney one who doesn’t believe she’s attractive, but for some reason decided to enter a modelling competition anyway (!).
Alex Evans – Loves the sound of her own voice, seems to think she might be just a bit too clever for modelling, actually.
Lisa Fowler – A small boy who snuck into the auditions for BNTM for a joke and has somehow outwitted the judges so far.
Aaron Hunt – The mouthy one who is seemingly hellbent on causing row after row after row in the house. Particularly grating accent; probably put through for drama purposes rather than for model potential.
Lynzi Arnott – The one who has clearly already won the competition in her mind. I sincerely hope this doesn’t actually happen in real life as her ego would instantly inflate and suffocate everyone in the room.
Stefanie Wilson – The most intensely annoying person on the planet. Will happily call a house meeting over the pettiest transgression of house rules, and will hopefully be pranked by the others in increasingly horrible ways throughout the season.
The meat of the programme, the challenges and photoshoots, have remained fairly high-quality, with a Terry De Havilland/Scottee runway show (cue disappearing paper dresses and anklebreaker heels!); a topless shoot in which the girls are paired up for an “intimate” shot (ahem); and a Girls’ Night Out photoshoot, featuring girls at various stages of an imaginary night out (in which poor Catherine misses “angry” by a mile and is branded “a lunatic” by one of the judges).
This uber-successful format does what it says on the tin. It will appeal to die-hard fans and reality TV sadists (who only watch to see the models bicker and cry), but certainly don’t expect it to set the fashion world on fire.
