Guest Author - David Landry

It’s never clear whether we’re laughing with him or at him, but Yogi Berra has produced some of the funniest quotes ever attributed to an athlete. The Yankee great has had a knack for making us listen closely and think twice.

The thing to remember when reading them is his oft repeated statement “I didn’t really say everything I said”. I don’t know if he said all of them, but I like every one of them.

"This is like deja vu all over again."

"If you come to a fork in the road, take it."

"You can observe a lot just by watching."

"He must have made that before he died.

“If you don’t catch the ball, you catch the bus home.”

"You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."

“We were overwhelming underdogs.”

"I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early."

"If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else."

"If you can't imitate him, don't copy him."

"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."

"Baseball is 90% mental. The other half is physical."

"It was impossible to get a conversation going. Everybody was talking too much."

"A nickel ain't worth a dime today."

"Nobody goes there anymore. It's too crowded."

"It gets late early out there."

"I take a two hour nap, from one o'clock to four."

"You give 100 percent in the first half of the game, and if that isn't enough in the second half you give what's left."

"I always thought that record would stand until it was broken."

"If the fans don't come out to the ball park, you can't stop them."

"The other teams could make trouble for us if they win."

"He can run anytime he wants. I'm giving him the red light."

"I never blame myself when I'm not hitting. I just blame the bat, and if it keeps up, I change bats.

"The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase."

"You should always go to other people's funerals. Otherwise, they won't come to yours."

“If you ask me a question I don't know, I'm not going to answer.”

“The only reason I need these gloves is 'cause of my hands.”

“If the world were perfect, it wouldn't be.”

“Never answer an anonymous letter.”

“I'm as red as a sheet.”

"It's not too far, it just seems like it is.”

“If you don't set goals, you can't regret not reaching them.”

“We have a good time together, even when we're not together.”

“Little League baseball is a good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets and the kids out of the house.”

“The future ain't what it used to be.”

“Pair up in threes.”

“Don't get me right, I'm just asking.”

“I wish I had an answer to that, because I'm tired of answering that question.”

“We made too many wrong mistakes.”

“We're lost, but we're making great time!”

“I knew exactly where it was, I just couldn't find it.”

“I don't remember leaving, so I guess we didn't go.”

“I always thought that record would stand until it was broken.”

“You can observe a lot just by watching.”

“No, you didn't wake me up. I had to get up to answer the phone anyway.”

“Shut up and talk.”