Guest Author - Rose Thomason
Have you celebrated your 25th birthday for the last ten years? Twenty? Here are some signs that maybe, just maybe, you might be getting a little older.
1. You walk into a room and forget why you’re there. Repeat four times
before realizing you just wanted a drink of water.
2. You’re asleep, but other’s worry you’re dead.
3. Your friend is dating someone more than half their age, and isn’t
breaking any laws.
4. People call you at 8pm and ask, “Did I wake you?” They did.
5. Happy hour is a nap.
6. You have a party and your neighbors don’t even realize it.
7. You have more hair in your ears than on your head. And you don’t care.
8. It takes three tries to get up from the couch.
9. It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
10. You sink your teeth into a grilled cheese. They stay there.
11. The twinkle in your eye is just the reflection of the sun on your
12. You can’t remember where you put you’re glasses.
13. An hour later you remember you’re wearing your glasses.
14. You sit in a rocking chair, but you can’t get it going.
15. You’re secrets are always safe with your friends because they can’t
16. You don’t worry about tying shoelaces. All your shoes are slip-ons.
17. Adult diapers? Actually, they’re kind of convenient.
18. You look both ways before crossing a room.
19. Your worst enemy? Gravity.
20. You see toys from your childhood. In a museum.
21. Your knees buckle. Your belt won’t.
22. You start every sentence with “Nowadays…” or “When I was your age…”
23. Someone says it’s windy today, and you reply, “No, it’s Thursday.”
24. You pet your cat on the bathroom counter. It’s really your toupee.
25. You get winded on the stairs. Going down.
There are many perks to getting older. Such as closer parking, discounts and the fact that you're least likely to get kidnapped.
In fact, you can still play your favorite games. Just… mildly altered.
1. Sag, You're It!
2. Spin the Bottle. Of Mylanta.
3. 20 questions. SHOUTED INTO YOUR GOOD EAR.
4. Doc Doc Goose.
5. Simon Says (something incoherent).
And just remember: The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs!