Guest Author - Stephanie L Watson

Going through a divorce can be as devastating as a death. I never thought of this until one of my good friends told me, when I was going through my divorce, that I would have been better off if my husband had died, like hers did.

I was flabbergasted at the statement and I am not sure I agree. But I do agree that divorce is like a death, it is actually the death of the dream you had together. There are so many emotions being felt at the same time that sometimes you are not sure what to feel. Sometimes we tend to push our emotions down in order to get through the day. This can be a good thing to do if you have children you are trying to raise, but at the same time, you need a way to vent your emotions.

One of the ways to be able to experience your emotions and express them is by journaling. By writing down your feelings in a journal, even a blog, you can often identify thoughts and feelings that you did not conscientiously realize that you had. If you are a person who keeps your feelings to yourself, journaling can become even more important to you to help you release your feelings than for people who tend to express their feelings well to others.

When you are writing a journal it is perfectly fine to be contradictory because no one is going to correct you. Today you may feel sad, tomorrow you might feel elated. In your journal this is acceptable. Sometimes writing down feelings that you would never act upon can help you deal with them better. Writing down that sometimes you wish your ex would get hit by a car is a lot better than actually running him over. Additionally, writing down your feelings and thoughts will help you identify productive behaviors and non productive behaviors.

Try ending each day with an entry in your journal of one good thing that occurred during the day. This can help you learn to see the positive in your situation. You can also use the journal as a way to vent away all the bad things that happened today. You can write in your journal anytime that you want to, there are no rules. Sometimes when you are expressing your feelings on paper, or on a blog as the case may be, you will be more able to find out how you are really feeling. You may be able to pinpoint the important issues amongst the petty ones swirling around in your head. Also, a year from now, you can reread what you wrote and see first hand, how far you've come in getting past your divorce.

One caution to journaling, make sure that you keep your journal in a safe place so that no one else will be able to get to your private thoughts. You do not want others to know how your personal feelings are affecting you in some circumstances. This is really important if you're still involved in litigation. You do not want your private thoughts to be interpreted as threatening to your ex or used against you in court. If you choose to journal via blog remember that even if you think you are anonymous, you're not. Be careful about what you say on line and how much detail you give.

Do not allow this to stop you from journaling, just use some common sense in how you do it. Journaling can go a long way in helping you on your road to recovery.