Guest Author - Caroline Henrich
Many blogs, Internet sites, weekly and tabloid magazines are featuring reality mom Kate Gosselin's new hair extensions. There are also many people talking about these extensions. Opinions range from people supporting her making a fresh start, and others who believe it is only for publicity for a new reality show.
Changing one's appearance after a traumatic experience may be related to shedding the negative feelings associated with an event such as divorce. The ability to look forward with hope is a testament to peoples' ability to heal.
Some people feel that a woman should only focus on her children after a divorce and that it is selfish to focus on herself. Conveying a positive self image to one's children will set a good example for them. This however should be tempered using common sense. Getting a new haircut or buying new clothes is not the same thing as going out every night for months at a time and leaving your children with a babysitter.
It can often be difficult to manage to achieve balance,as there are tremendous emotional "swings" after divorce. It is possible to be terribly depressed one minute and giddy with excitement the next. Therefore it is necessary to try to achieve balance with the assistance of family, friends and professionals, if necessary.
People should also realize that it is not necessary to get hair extensions and be on the cover of a magazine to overcome divorce. The money that is spent is not directly proportional to the amount of healing achieved. This is especially true in this economy.
Changing behavior can be as important as changing appearances. Perhaps you did not like to go for walks before your divorce. Try taking a walk now and enjoying the fresh air. There is no secret and no panacea. Each person needs to make their own personal determination.
Only time will tell whether or not Kate Gosselin's new hair extensions helps her to put her divorce behind her and start a new life. If she feels better about herself and projects that positive image to her kids, which can help them heal as well, then there is some positive benefit to them.
If the change you make causes you to smile, even for a minute, then embrace that feeling.