Earth Angels and Toxic Relationships
The question I find most often from fellow Earth Angels and the like (I’m paraphrasing) is, “Why, if I’m so intuitive, loving, giving, patient, prayerful, etc…“ am I constantly finding myself in bad situations or heart-broken, again and again?”
They’re smart individuals, capable, beautiful inside and out and may even find themselves saying, they know better or want something or someone better for themselves. Still, there’s something inside that compels them to the depths of their Soul, to give and give and give some more creating the illusion that in some fashion or another, deserve what they get or destined to live a life barely worth living at all. Not so…
What often happens is something you may already be familiar with. Many professionals use it, “Conflict of Interest!”
For the Earth Angel and Light Worker, it’s more of a cross-road where Life Purpose and the condition or "navigation of the heart" intersects, perpetuating themselves again and again.
Both romantic and social relationship with friends and even family can have these complications. But there is a way to limit and initiate damage control.
The first area, which can be difficult at first to administer, is before anything else, be willing to stand face-to-face with yourself, look in the mirror and repeat:
“I take full responsibility. Currently, I’m allowing myself to be a willing participant with certain people and situations that may not have my best interest, care or well-being, at heart.”
The next area will have to do with boundaries. For the Earth Angel, this can feel a bit like withdrawal. It invades what their perception of Life Purpose is all about. It’s what they do…they help and are often there for a person day or night!
The problem with not having boundaries is that (these boundaries) they’ll seem to keep stretching further and further like a rubber band. Even after swearing to never have such a thing happen again, they‘re often there once again to the rescue. With assertion you need to be able to say:
“No…I’m just not able to help this time. I need to take care of myself.”
If you’ve particularly had enough, say you’re easily replaced or cancelled when someone else comes a long, such as a date, a man, a woman or someone else considered to be a bit more "entertaining" for the person in need. You can say, “Have (fill in the name) help." and politely hang up or distract yourself by doing something actually FOR yourself.
These are just a few ways you can begin setting your own rules. From there, the stage is yours. Once you find that stage, you'll see you're where you need to be, and do precisely what it is you were meant to...Door-mat, is not an option!
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