Guest Author - Andrea Gardiner, Ph.D.

As infants you are born into this world not possessing the physical faculties or wherewithal to perform the basic functions that are necessary for physical survival. So the ones who are bigger than you (namely your parents) bless and provide you with food, shelter, care, and love. As you grow older the adults in your life, all with good intent, continue to dictate to you what you should eat, wear, do, and sometimes even think. Although these instructions are most often given with the best of intentions they are also given with the air of assertion. So when your mother told you to eat those green beans, she stated it clearly, and maybe even forcefully, as she was certain that this food item is healthy and nutritious. As adults, it is not uncommon for you to see this world, or Universe, as one of assertion. It is not uncommon for you to hold the idea or philosophy that assertion is one of the many orders of the day and that another individual holds power or control over you and the decisions you make.

So what is assertion and the philosophy or mentality that may accompany it? Well, when first encountered it may seem obvious, after all “assertion” is defined by Webster as stating something with confidence and force or claiming one’s rights; however, when you consider the frame of mind that escorts this definition then its philosophy begins to become a bit obscure. It can however become evident when you take a look at its most popular societal usage.

For example, the idea of self-assertion is widely used in many self-help articles and books in an effort to make individuals sure of themselves and their rights, essentially being taught how to stand up for yourself. The problem with such an approach is that it forces you to acknowledge and focus on the invalid idea that someone else could be, or is in control of you. You reiterate to yourself an idea that states you are not truly the one guiding and controlling your experiences because the will of another is thwarting that. So you believe that one can assert themselves upon you and you respond by asserting right back. This mentality is the very philosophy and thus attitude that is engendered with the notion of any type of assertion, and it almost brings back the memories of mother forcing you to eat those green beans!

When you consider the idea of assertion, your thoughts are drawn to one thing and that is how another holds will over you. From a metaphysical standpoint this is not valid; while another individual may definitely influence your attitude, you are still the only one that is in control of your thoughts and vibration. From this point of view your human rights and authority over Self is given so you do not need to fight to assert them, but must only recognize them as self evident.