Guest Author - Paula Petrie

For many of us, Christmas is the most joyful holiday season that we celebrate. And for many of us it is also the most stressful. In a futile attempt to create perfection, we can overextend ourselves mentally, physically, and financially. I can’t offer you the magic elixir to make everything run smoothly, but I can offer you some insight from experience.

Begin by evaluating where it is that you feel you are not measuring up. Then, form a plan with alternatives and shortcuts to produce what you basically desire. And remember, it’s not the end result we really want it’s the Christmas journey.

Your plan may be as simple as following a shopping list. Don’t deviate; your loved ones know that you would give them the world, but they don’t expect it under the tree. You may not give the perfect gift, but you can give a nice or thoughtful one.

If the problem is finances. Consider your buying habits. Do you try to buy too many gifts? Is your budget for each gift realistic? Can you shave down costs with cards, baking, or crafts from the kids instead? These make truly great gifts.

One way to shave costs (if you can stand it) is to purchase only the items that you "must have" early. All other gifts can be purchased a day or two before Christmas when you can find many items at half price.

Do you feel pressured to buy more for your children than you can afford? Could you try buying one larger ticket item from their list plus a couple of cheaper “mom’s picks” instead? Kids may ask for a lot, but I find they rarely expect a lot, don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself. Enjoying time with your kids is where the happy memories come from, for both of you. Create a family outing by helping out at the food bank, for perspective. As for the spoiled neighbor kid who gets everything, don’t worry there is one in every crowd.

Have the decorations caused you to lose some of your glitter? Is finding the time and extra cash to light up the outside of your home getting you down? I love a well-lit house at Christmas, but I am a jinx when it comes to producing one. Lights seem to burn out when they sense me coming. I have found that compensating with a beautifully constructed wreath or something else to create a welcoming doorway lighted by the porch light produces Christmas cheer.

A home decorated with enthusiasm from kids with glitter and pasty crafts can mean more to everyone in the family and everyone who visits than a designer showcase ever will. If your sensibilities will allow, let the kids have free reign of one area, or have a family night making popcorn garlands. Your home will smell great. Pick one small area where you get to choose the decorations. I have found taking a walk through a Christmas design store can fill you with ideas that you can re-create with purchases from a dollar store and things from around the house.

Is the problem party planning? Pick a theme, say poinsettias or glittery cloth, and add touches and same color everywhere. Stick with disposable and plastic plates and cups. Pick a menu or finger foods that are low stress and low expense. At this year’s family gathering, my kids are given the task of each making two baked goods. My job is simply to pick up the ingredients. Ambience and atmosphere are key, so background music or a board game, etc. can go a long way to create a great time.

The only advice I can add is not to let yourself get caught up in desire to recreate the amazing and beautiful array bombarding you in the marketplace. Pick one area where you can excel, say beautifully wrapped gifts, and don't fuss over the rest. It is too much pressure, too much money, and too much stress. If you get the urge to have a taste of this grandeur, take a stroll through a Christmas shop. The Christmas holidays are really about the love and joy you create, which is the opposite of stressfully produce.

Sometimes to successfully change one habit, you need to change your entire perspective, by changing the way you do a lot of Christmas related tasks. Take it slow, decide what you want Christmas to really be about and set about making new traditions.