Guest Author - Paula Petrie

Mid-night conversations with an infant child can leave you worn, depleted, and performing daytime tasks with reduced intelligence. Everyone hopes that after adjustments are made to accommodate a new baby in the house, things will soon go back to “normal.” But, how to get a baby to sleep through the night is an ageless question.

The fact that it is still a top concern of parents, shows this issue is more about our unwillingness to accept that we can’t “control” babies, than about understanding our own baby’s needs. While this information is probably not music to your ears, sleepless nights are a phase that will pass, and soon you’ll be rested and moving on to other, equally disturbing, parenting challenges.

There are lots of books and gadgets claiming solutions but I suspect the books thrive because of our overwhelming desire for uninterrupted sleep. With any advice ask yourself these questions. Does what they say make sense or does it feel right? Is it right for your baby's personality? What could be changed to make a nighttime routine work for both you and your baby? The approach you try may not work or may not work later on, as your baby enters a new stage of development. You have to remain open to your new ever-changing world. Through years of time tested theories, the standing question remains, how do you choose to respond?

You have needs and expectations. Your baby is also a unique personality with needs, expectations, and limited skills of expression. It becomes your task through will, guidance, perseverance, and instinct, to reach a mutually acceptable solution. A gentle yet firm guiding hand is a mother’s best tool.

Stick to a Schedule.

Taking a baby through the bedtime routine of a relaxing bath, followed by a warm reassuring breast or a warm comforting chest to fill his belly with soothing milk, should have him ready for sleep. Rub the sheet to warm it and leave your scent. Rocking, stroking, reading, soft music, and singing also help relax baby. You are building security for your baby as he learns that sleep is pleasant and safe. Some babies are accepting of bedtime right from the start, some babies need convincing. If a baby is just not sleepy at the appointed bedtime and you may be better off allowing him to stay up an extra half hour, for a short time at least.

Some parents prefer to put baby to bed awake and have him go to sleep by himself. Mom can offer a crying baby comfort, but is not with baby when he falls asleep. This method involves several nights of letting baby cry it out, works fine for some, but rarely works for high need babies. Although initially tough on the baby, eventually this is less exhausting for the parents. A combination of many styles as your baby grows through stages may work best.