Guest Author - Rebecca Wilson

My oldest daughter has arrived at the age where her body is beginning to change in preparation for puberty. Though still a child, her body is preparing for womanhood. It has been bittersweet as I watch my baby girl grow into the young girl who will grow into a young woman in the blink of an eye. I want her to remain my sweet little girl and yet I celebrate the woman she will become. I imagine this is true for millions of mothers worldwide.

During puberty a girl's body is preparing for a monthly menstrual cycle as it prepares to create, grow, and sustain life. It is important that she know ahead of time what is happening to her body, and be prepared for what is to come. Likewise, it is important that mothers and fathers educate their girls in a respectful, positive way. How parents handle their daughter's journey into puberty will dramatically influence her view of not only the bodily changes she is experiencing but also her self-worth as a girl and a woman.

When discussing her body and the process of puberty, be respectful and positive. Never joke or be light hearted. Use the appropriate language but avoid being overly clinical in your discussion. Some girls are private, some are open, and most are somewhere in between. My oldest daughter leans toward the private end of the spectrum. Therefore, my husband I knew that these earliest discussions needed to be solely between our daughter and me. In the future, my husband will talk to her and we will discuss the topics openly, but the initial approach and education needed to be in private with her mother.

Both parents need to overcome any discomfort they may have in discussing these topics with their daughter. How a father responds will deeply impact his daughter's view of her body, her self-esteem, and future intimate relationships. He needs to be himself yet strong and supportive. Mothers need to pay attention to the remarks they make about their own bodies and reproductive cycles because what we say about ourselves helps to shape how our daughters view themselves.

Talking to our daughters about puberty is not a one-time discussion but a series of on-going discussions for many years. Begin with small tidbits of information, ask open-ended questions, and make yourself available if your daughter has any questions later. Chances are, she may ask mom, but dads, be prepared in the event your daughter comes to you for information and support.

For more information: Center for Young Women's Health