Guest Author - Lisa Polovin Pinkus
Probably the most extraordinary and life changing events in a women’s life are the births of her children. Not for the physical experience of birthing and raising children (though that is life altering), but for the spiritual experience that we cannot always put our finger on.
Our children observe us intensely – and, sometimes, perhaps, subconsciously – and they learn from every action we make. This means we have a lot of work to do improving the way we live and ensuring that we are living according to the values we believe in.
Moms - take some time to contemplate the values you wish to bestow upon your children and ensure you are living your lives modeling those values to your children. Here are a few of my thoughts:
I want my children to learn from me – how to respond appropriately when they feel so angry they could explode. I want them to watch me as I take action in the community standing up for the things I believe in. I want them to hear me communicating in a way that allows them to feel comfortable and loved and unafraid of words. I want them to believe that their purpose in this world has a lot to do with how they relate to others, what contributions they make to future generations, and that the bigger picture – though harder to see – is often more important. These are life long lessons and ones that I continue to face on a daily basis.
I do not want my children to feel the wrath of an impatient mama. I do not want them to be afraid of getting yelled at for doing something wrong. I do not want them to wonder if their mommy and daddy love each other. I want my children to feel a calm and peacefulness whenever they are in their home. I want them to be ok with making mistakes. I want them to feel they can explore life in their own unique way. I want them to always know how much their mommy and daddy love them.
I do not want my children to be envious of what other children have but rather to be grateful for all that they have. I do not want my children to do things only because someone asks them to but because they have an internal drive that wills them to do it. I do not want my children to be waited on hand and foot or to get everything they ask for but, rather, I want them to work for the things they desire and to see the rewards of their efforts. I want my children to be inspired to do good for others. I want them to learn that life has rewards and life has disappointments, and they can live successfully through both.
Teaching my children how to live and how to strive for higher ground is a difficult task. I’m still working on my own Self. Therein lies the spiritual journey of motherhood and the harsh reality that we don’t always pay attention to the extraordinary sparks within the ordinary moments of daily life. Each of those moments contains an invaluable impact on the generations for years to come. Life is a test and finding spirituality is the means with which to survive.
There is so much I would like to impart to my children. I invite you to add to my list or make adjustments to suit your own family. Knowing what we want to give our children is the first step on our journey – and a step we must constantly evaluate and make additions to.