WHAT MEN REALLY MEAN...
|WHAT THEY SAY|
What They Really Mean
I'M GOING FISHING
|"I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with|
a stick in my hand, while the fish
swim by in complete safety."
IT'S A GUY THING
|"There is no rational thought pattern|
connected with it, and you have
no chance at all of making it logical."
CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?
|"Why isn't it already on the table?"|
UH HUH, SURE, HONEY,
It's a conditioned response."
IT WOULD TAKE
|"I have no idea how it works."|
TAKE A BREAK HONEY,
|"I can't hear the game|
over the vacuum cleaner."
THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR.
|"Are you still talking?"|
YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS
|"I remember the theme song to 'F Troop',|
the address of the first girl I ever kissed,
and the vehicle identification numbers
of every car I've ever owned,
but I forgot your birthday."
OH, DON'T FUSS,
|"I have actually severed a limb,|
but will bleed to death before
I admit that I'm hurt.
HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS
|"And I sure hope|
I think of some pretty soon."
I CAN'T FIND IT.
|"It didn't fall into my outstretched|
hands, so I'm completely clueless."
WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?
|"What did you catch me at?"|
I HEARD YOU.
|"I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."|
YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER
|"I am used to the way you yell at me,|
and realize it could be worse."
YOU LOOK TERRIFIC.
|"Please don't try on one more outfit,|
I'M NOT LOST.
|"No one will ever see us alive again."|
WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK.
|"I make the messes, she cleans them up."|
YOU'RE THE BEST WIFE
|"Please buy me something nice for Christmas."|
~~ Author Unknown ~~