Guest Author - Kelli Deister

Perhaps one of the most frustrating things for a deaf mother is to know that there will be times when she won’t hear her child cry or call for her. When this happens, it is best for the mother and child to attend family classes that teach American Sign Language. In the interim, there are agencies in your community that stand ready to assist you. When there are young children at stake and the mother is being harassed with threats of losing custody of her child, it can indeed be very stressful.

Unfortunately, some people believe that deafness is a disability and they begin to express concerns over whether or not the mother is fit to be a parent. This is absolutely absurd, since deafness has no effect on whether or not the mother can tend to her child with the best possible care. Abusers normally use scenarios such as this one as a further means of abusing their spouse. The only difference is, this time the abuser uses the legal system to launch his abuse against her.

Just because a mother is deaf is no reason why custody should be given to the abuser. Yet, there are some abusers that take this route. The victim knows their abuser is lying. Yet, she feels helpless on how best to proceed. After all, the abuser is the one that enters the court room and can talk, without the need of an interpreter. Yet, even in my case, I had to have ASL interpreters throughout the custody case involving my two children and their dad. At that time, the defense attorney taunted me with the fact that I was hard of hearing. Unfortunately, we live in an era when judges tend to look at the countenance of both parents while there for the hearing.

I recommend visiting the domestic violence site here at Bella Online for information on state resource listings. Jeanette Norman is the editor for the domestic violence site here, which is rich in resource information. Look below this article for the link to her site on domestic violence. If you are looking for any information on abuse and domestic violence, please consider emailing Jeanette for further information. She has made sure that her site has a plethora of valuable information.

Just because an abuse victim is deaf or hard of hearing, there is no valid reason why the child cannot stay with their mother. Deafness is not a disability. The only area of concern would be communication. However, even then, there are many assistive devices that can help the deaf parent to hear their child’s cries.

If you are a victim of domestic violence, with custody issues, please consider contacting Jeanette Norman, editor of the Bella Online domestic violence site for help in locating resources available to you, such as legal assistance. Don’t let anyone tell you that simply because you are deaf, you cannot adequately care for your child. That is not acceptable. You do have equal rights in this area.