logo
g Text Version
Beauty & Self
Books & Music
Career
Computers
Education
Family
Food & Wine
Health & Fitness
Hobbies & Crafts
Home & Garden
Money
News & Politics
Relationships
Religion & Spirituality
Sports
Travel & Culture
TV & Movies

dailyclick
Bored? Games!
Nutrition
Postcards
Take a Quiz
Rate My Photo

new
European Travel
Action Movies
Bible Basics
Houseplants
Romance Movies
Creativity
Family Travel


dailyclick
All times in EST

Full Schedule
g
g Stress Management Site

BellaOnline's Stress Management Editor

g

How to Get Your Man to Share His Feelings


Most conflicts between men and women occur because women want to talk and explore the issue from all angles and men just want to fix it quickly. Once you understand that the idea of just talking can be a frightening experience for a man, the solution becomes simple: Blend your two styles. To insure that he doesn’t feel cornered, talk to him while he is doing something else and don’t make eye contact. Discussing issues while you work next to him gives him a sense that sharing his feelings will lead to a tangible solution. For example, both of you can be washing the car, cleaning up the yard, or painting some cabinets and relating what’s on your mind. Basically, both of you have crossed over to the other side to experience the gender difference. You are doing and he is talking!

Now that you have his attention, don’t waste it with judgment. It is important to be affirming because a man desires a woman’s approval more than anything, specifically, that he is a good provider and protector. Make him feel that he is indispensable. If you want openness in a relationship, you have to create a safe environment. Avoid criticizing him as soon as he says something you don’t agree with.

On the other hand, try to be as literal as possible (men don’t understand female metaphors) and don’t say things you don’t mean. For example, he brings home a beautiful bouquet of flowers and you say, “You shouldn’t have…” Next time you can be sure he won’t and you will be angry that he didn’t. However, you invalidated what he did right; he is not a mind reader.

Perhaps, you have not considered the culpable part you play in his suppressed emotional expression, telling your girlfriends all the intimate details! The worst thing you can do is to betray his confidences and vulnerabilities to your girlfriends who may betray you in the same fashion by broadcasting it to their friends. You can be sure that he doesn’t discuss your intimate issues with the guys! Show him some respect. The girlfriends you tell all and trust today might turn on you some day and become toxic.

Here are some suggestions to encourage him to share his feelings:
  • Feed him a good meal with a little wine and he will open up.
  • Take a walk together in a beautiful, natural setting filled with positive energy.
  • Avoid statements like, “You don’t love me anymore,” when what you really mean, “I don’t understand your style of loving me because it is so different from mine.”
  • Use humor. He will feel relaxed and not threatened. Don’t tell him a joke with a long prologue. Even worse, don’t make a joke about him, but you can kid around about men in general; even better, make jokes about yourself or women in general. Keep in mind that men love slapstick humor and the dirtier or cruder the better!
  • If he uses humor to break the ice, make sure you laugh a lot! This will make him feel appreciated and good about himself while laughing relieves your stress and makes you more receptive.

Debbie Mandel, MA is the author of Changing Habits: The Caregivers' Total Workout and Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind and Soul, a stress-reduction specialist, motivational speaker, a personal trainer and mind/body lecturer. She is the host of the weekly Turn On Your Inner Light Show on WGBB AM1240 in New York City , produces a weekly wellness newsletter, and has been featured on radio/ TV and print media. To learn more visit: www.turnonyourinnerlight.com
Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to Twitter Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to Facebook Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to MySpace Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to Del.icio.us Digg How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to Yahoo My Web Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to Google Bookmarks Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to Stumbleupon Add How+to+Get+Your+Man+to+Share+His+Feelings to Reddit




RSS | Related Articles | Editor's Picks Articles | Top Ten Articles | Previous Features | Site Map


For FREE email updates, subscribe to the Stress Management Newsletter


Past Issues


print
Printer Friendly
bookmark
Bookmark
tell friend
Tell a Friend
forum
Forum
email
Email Editor


Content copyright © 2014 by Debbie Mandel. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Debbie Mandel. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Debbie Mandel for details.

g


g features
How to Prevent Medical Mishaps

5 Ways To Reduce Stress To Fend Off Illness

Female Stress Could Pose a Risk for Alzheimer’s

Archives | Site Map

forum
Forum
email
Contact

Past Issues
memberscenter


vote
Poetry
Daily
Weekly
Monthly
Less than Monthly



BellaOnline on Facebook
g


| About BellaOnline | Privacy Policy | Advertising | Become an Editor |
Website copyright © 2014 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.


BellaOnline Editor