Worried about how your teen or young adult will face the challenges of non-committed relationships while in college? Maybe they're carrying more of your sage advice with them then you thought.

It seems that abstinence is making a comeback on college campuses. Surprised? Me too! But a group of 100 students on the Harvard University campus has made a commitment to remaining chaste until marriage (see Harvard Group Promotes Abstinence on Campus at CNN.com).

Why the move towards abstinence? Apparently it has to do more with values and commitment than the fear of STDs. Will it last? Who knows. According to the CNN article, members of the group have admitted to having relations in the past. Their new committment to going without may be an odd backlash against what some perceive as a "mindless" activity; or, it may be a mini-social revolution. But, whatever the reasoning behind the move, I have to applaud these young adults for their convictions.

In an era where STDs remain a major health issue for college-aged students; and, where morals have been defined and redefined to the point that boundaries are a bit blurry, the choice to abstain--however idealistic it may appear to be--should be applauded. By coming forward and openly declaring their convictions, these students are exposing themselves to possible ridicule. Maybe, just maybe, their peers will see some value in their action (or rather non-action) and the trend will catch on.

My children are young and I'm still in denial that they'll ever have relations with the opposite sex. But, realistically, I think they should be prepared for the eventuality. However, when discussing the topic (having "the talk"), I'm going to make certain to include information on abstinence and share the tale of the 100 students who decided to commit to this idea. Maybe they'll listen. As they say, expect the best, but plan for the worst.

If you would like to read up on intimacy, relationships and the college student, I suggest Evelyn Lerman’s The New Morality. It’s a good primer on the status of sex, teens and the modern era.

Until next time!

Lynn Byrne

Preparing for college admissions? Trying to find direction? Need a little help with the planning? Check out my college planning series:

• College Planning Made Easy--the planning and preparation workbook for the take charge, college-bound student,
  
• Paying for College Made Easy--a college financing guide designed to assist students and families in preparing and planning for higher education expenses; and
  
• The Great Scholarship Search--my guide for students and parents researching and applying for scholarship funding.