logo
g Text Version
Beauty & Self
Books & Music
Career
Computers
Education
Family
Food & Wine
Health & Fitness
Hobbies & Crafts
Home & Garden
Money
News & Politics
Relationships
Religion & Spirituality
Sports
Travel & Culture
TV & Movies

dailyclick
Bored? Games!
Nutrition
Postcards
Take a Quiz
Rate My Photo

new
Creativity
Family Travel
Southwest USA
Irish Culture
Home Finance
Comedy Movies
Romance Novels


dailyclick
All times in EST

Full Schedule
g
g Etiquette Site

BellaOnline's Etiquette Editor

g

Making Eye Contact


Maybe itís our obsession with accessories. Perhaps we are so distracted looking around at all the stuff, we forget to look at who we are with. Our culture is so in-tune with seeing how money is spent and how we adorn ourselves with bling that the sparkle of the eyes gets lost.

When was the last time you looked a person in the eye? I mean really looked at their eyes while you were having a conversation with them. When you spoke to them were you looking at them? In order to convey your idea did you adamantly seek out their attention by looking them in the face? Or were you looking at their earrings? Glancing at their shoes? Perhaps you were looking past them, over their shoulder at the person behind them?

And what about when they spoke to you? Did you convey your listening skills by paying attention? Were you fixedly looking at them, paying attention to what they were saying? If not, you need to try it. Better yet, please do it, for decorumís sake. Youíll be amazed at the response you get from someone who knows you are truly giving them your full attention.

I still recall the first time I made a point of looking someone in the eye. There was a crowd of us, perhaps 8-10 people, squished in around a table. It was evenly mixed guys and girls. One of the guys at the table was recalling his recent vacation. I looked right at him and it was like he was talking straight to me. Occasionally heíd move his eyes around to the others at the table. But his eyes always rested back on my own. Unfortunately, in the end, I did not receive the desired outcome. He interpreted my undivided attention as flirting and he winked at me when he was done. Of course, I did receive lots of attention from him the remainder of the evening. But thatís another story.

While at church itís easy for me to get distracted. I keep from zoning by looking at my pastor while he speaks. Who do you think he looks back at when addressing my side of the pulpit? Me. Itís the same with all public speakers. They search the crowd of listeners to see who is, in fact, listening. When they see someone looking at them itís mutually engaging. Making eye contact with the speaker, whether in a crowd, around a table or one on one, is a non-verbal compliment.

So the next time you are talking to someone, whether itís a group or face to face, remember eye contact. Resist the desire to see whatís happening in other areas of the room or restaurant. Show the person(s) you are with that they have your attention. Ditch the need to look around and stay focused on whatís happening in front of you. Keep your listeners attention by engaging them with your eyes. The results may very well astound.




Add Making+Eye+Contact to Twitter Add Making+Eye+Contact to Facebook Add Making+Eye+Contact to MySpace Add Making+Eye+Contact to Del.icio.us Digg Making+Eye+Contact Add Making+Eye+Contact to Yahoo My Web Add Making+Eye+Contact to Google Bookmarks Add Making+Eye+Contact to Stumbleupon Add Making+Eye+Contact to Reddit




RSS | Related Articles | Editor's Picks Articles | Top Ten Articles | Previous Features | Site Map


For FREE email updates, subscribe to the Etiquette Newsletter


Past Issues


print
Printer Friendly
bookmark
Bookmark
tell friend
Tell a Friend
forum
Forum
email
Email Editor


Content copyright © 2014 by Lisa Plancich. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Lisa Plancich. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Lisa Plancich for details.

g


g features
Small Talk Topics

Networking

Kids at the Pool

Archives | Site Map

forum
Forum
email
Contact

Past Issues
memberscenter


vote
Poetry
Daily
Weekly
Monthly
Less than Monthly



BellaOnline on Facebook
g


| About BellaOnline | Privacy Policy | Advertising | Become an Editor |
Website copyright © 2014 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.


BellaOnline Editor