logo
g Text Version
Beauty & Self
Books & Music
Career
Computers
Education
Family
Food & Wine
Health & Fitness
Hobbies & Crafts
Home & Garden
Money
News & Politics
Relationships
Religion & Spirituality
Sports
Travel & Culture
TV & Movies

dailyclick
Bored? Games!
Nutrition
Postcards
Take a Quiz
Rate My Photo

new
Houseplants
Romance Movies
Creativity
Family Travel
Southwest USA
Irish Culture
Home Finance


dailyclick
All times in EST

Low Carb: 8:00 PM

Full Schedule
g
g Stress Management Site

BellaOnline's Stress Management Editor

g

Are You Experiencing Compassion Fatigue?


Most spiritualists urge you to be compassionate to others to feel good about yourself. In a sense the motive for volunteering is quite selfish. You generate good feelings about yourself by benevolently giving. You define yourself, feeling worthwhile that you matter to someone else and bask in the glory. But could you possibly be overdoing it? Could you be feeling so stressed, so second-rate, that you have lost your own voice, your own image in the mirror and need to be reflected in someone else’s eyes? You just might be suffering from compassion fatigue.

You can reliably diagnose whether you are suffering from compassion fatigue if after you help someone out whether a family member, friend, colleague or stranger, you feel resentful! You start muttering inaudibly, “Why do I always have to do it?” or “Why doesn’t anyone do something for me?” I find it amusing that energy vampires, narcissists, and real users know just whom to go to – YOU! Blessed are those who give, so let someone else be blessed for a change.

However, compassion fatigue is merely a symptom of a more invasive disorder – generalized identity anxiety. The root cause is a lack of self-empowerment. In other words, you rate your self-worth based on the praise of others. “You are such a good person!” It’s time to liberate yourself emotionally by getting rid of the guilt and those old worn-out beliefs, like “Don’t show off.” It’s time to own it, strut your stuff and free yourself physically by ceasing to helicopter over everyone else. Helicopter over yourself for a change and break this heart-deadening pattern with awareness.

Ask yourself the following questions before you do something for someone else:
  • Does this request resonate for me?
  • Do I have the time and energy?
  • Am I conflicted between ought to and want to?
  • At what cost to me?
Here is an exercise that will help objectify the situation. Keeping a record of what you do in black and white objectifies your activities, giving you much needed distance to step back and see the whole picture. Divide a page into two columns. In the first column list what you did today for everyone else. In the second column list what you did just for you. Do the two columns match? Make sure that at the end of every day the second column is not overwhelmed by the first column. Keep this daily journal of "Look what I did” to combat compassion fatigue. In a couple of weeks you will feel energized, optimistic and creative.

Absolutely, no excuses! Even if you are responsible for elderly parents, children, work, the house and friends-in-dire-need, you must take care of yourself. Because if you burn out or get sick and tired, you will certainly permit yourself the time for self-care. Do it now before this happens. It is always easier to prevent than to treat a disease. Well, I have to go now. It’s time for the next item on my to-do list: FUN.
For more information on finding balance in your life, read my book, Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind and Soul. To listen to archived radio shows with guest experts visit Turn On Your Inner Light Radio Show



Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to Twitter Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to Facebook Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to MySpace Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to Del.icio.us Digg Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to Yahoo My Web Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to Google Bookmarks Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to Stumbleupon Add Are+You+Experiencing+Compassion+Fatigue%3F to Reddit




RSS | Related Articles | Editor's Picks Articles | Top Ten Articles | Previous Features | Site Map


For FREE email updates, subscribe to the Stress Management Newsletter


Past Issues


print
Printer Friendly
bookmark
Bookmark
tell friend
Tell a Friend
forum
Forum
email
Email Editor


Content copyright © 2014 by Debbie Mandel. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Debbie Mandel. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Debbie Mandel for details.

g


g features
Summer Is The Best Time To Save Your Marriage

How to Deal With Stress Weight Gain

What Your Clutter Reveals About You

Archives | Site Map

forum
Forum
email
Contact

Past Issues
memberscenter


vote
Poetry
Daily
Weekly
Monthly
Less than Monthly



BellaOnline on Facebook
g


| About BellaOnline | Privacy Policy | Advertising | Become an Editor |
Website copyright © 2014 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.


BellaOnline Editor