The Pain of Silence
These were sounds of security, contentment and normalcy. They were the sounds of everyday life as we knew it. We loved these sounds. We were embarrassed by some and saddened by others but they were our sounds and they brought comfort.
When Aine died we heard a new sound. Emptiness. It is a hollow, bottomless pit of meaninglessness. A blankness that reminds us that our lives have been stripped of joy and left barren except for memories of what it was like before. Laughter is seldom and shallow and short lived. No children argue over toys or TV shows. No one is wrestling in the den or running in the hallway. There are no more bedtime giggles between little girls.
There is nothing to hear but the deafening sound of silence. Now one little girl looking for her own voice to fill the silence and not knowing how to do it alone. Now only one little girl who tries desperately to fill the blankness with her own laughter and her own thoughts and ideas. One little girl who doesn’t run in the halls anymore or talk to anyone in her bed at night.
As we continue to move forward in this hellish journey, we look for new sounds. Nothing will replace the sound of Aine. Nothing will fill the void that is now part of our home. We don’t want to replace her sound. We want to hear new sounds that remind us of her and bring a melancholy smile to our lips. We wait for the sounds of our living daughter to grow and deepen as her life changes. We wait for the sound of Aine to fill our hearts and souls as she always did.
A website has been established in our daughter's name. Please click here for more information about our mission.
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