How Not to Hate Mother’s Day

How Not to Hate Mother’s Day
Consumerist advertising is hammering the message that it’s to time to buy, buy, buy for Mother’s Day. Restaurants have released their special brunch menus and florists have created their special arrangements to celebrate mom. However, a significant number of the American population hates the negative triggers of Mother’s Day.

  • Grieving the loss of a loving mother or grandmother
  • The inner conflict of celebrating a narcissistic, cruel or critical mother
  • Dealing with the death of one’s child
  • The unrequited desire to have a child
  • A mother feeling disrespected or slighted on Mother’s Day
  • The expensive gift by which love is measured

So how do you cope with all the simmering sadness or mounting resentment? When you feel loved and safe, your brain experiences peace and calm. However, when you conjure up an image from the past which triggers a bad memory, then you relive it as your heart pounds, your face flushes and you get a headache. Your brain and body react to this old wound as if it were happening right now! Clearly, Mother’s Day can trigger a negative reaction or a positive response depending whether you feel currently devalued or self-actualized.

Look for opportunities to feel happy and expand your life – to re-parent yourself. Mother’s Day is a wonderful time to release your inner clutter. Think about how much better you will feel when you toss out haunting memories that no longer fit your life, causing you distress. Focus on the present simple minutes of your life which will lead to fulfilling years.

6 ways to feel happy on Mother’s Day
  1. Breathe: The first thing you did as soon as you were born and the cord was cut, you learned to breathe on your own. So breathe deeply – belly breaths – while you look at a fixed point in nature like a tree, a body of water, a flower, or a bird. Breathe and stare at this natural living thing until you see it with soft eyes as though you were in a trance. In this state give yourself a loving message you need to hear or say a little prayer for yourself.
  2. Start your creative project today. Giving birth is the ultimate creative act. When you experience loss, go the opposite direction and fill your empty heart with creativity.
  3. Get close to all those who have mothered you and helped you along the way. Honor them on Mother’s Day. If you wish to be a mother, get close to a family member’s or friend’s child. You can always volunteer in a nursing home or a children’s center.
  4. Release the hidden girl within. Mother’s Day is a wonderful starting point to leave the straight lines of your personality and take the spontaneous, joyous detours in life where you can lighten up and find your true identity.
  5. Don’t fall into the trap of materialism. Give your mother an experience where you spend time together, or do a chore for her, instead of spending conscience money on a contributory, expensive gift.
  6. Eat right and exercise to keep the body and brain you were born with healthy and strong.

For more information on managing your stress and reclaiming your life read my book, Addicted to Stress: A Woman's 7 Step Program to Reclaim Joy and Spontaneity in Life. To listen to archived radio shows with guest experts visit Turn On Your Inner Light Radio Show





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Content copyright © 2018 by Debbie Mandel. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Debbie Mandel. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Debbie Mandel for details.